Clause Jokes


Santa was asked to describe Mrs. Claus in three words.

His response was "Ho ho ho"

in Michael Jackson

what does Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?

they both leave children's room with an empty sack

in Michael Jackson

What does michael jackson and santa clause have in commen? They both let little kids sit on his lap

in Animal

What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence? -- A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.

in Dad

Q:Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack?

A:He only comes once a year.

in Puns

Roses are red He shows no remorse

Santa claus Has joined the terrorist force


What is worse to have - a dead baby or dead Santa Claus? Santa. You need extra freezers for reindeer.

Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack? He only comes once a year.


Christmas special

Me:can you describe mrs Claus in 3 words Santa: ho ho ho

oscar the grouch

So Santa fell down the chimney but it was a lit chimney...his names no longer Santa. It's crisp cringle. Pls send help :).


Russian Santa Claus- You better watch out, You better not cry, cause if you do I will stab your fucking eye, Russian Santa Claus does not fuck around. He's making a list, He's checking it twice... You better leave out some Vodka with ice!

in Michael Jackson

What do michael jackson and santa Claus have in common?

They both leave the little kids room with empty sacks.

in Michael Jackson

What did Santa Claus brought Michael Jackson for Christmas ? His elf’s 😂😂😂

What do you call a winter time contact?

A Santa clause.

Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack? He only comes once a year

in Christmas

What nationality is Santa Claus? - North Polish.

in Santa

why does santa claus have such a big sack??

cause he only comes once a year

in Santa

One man was very depressed cause he lost everything. He lost his job. He lost his home and he lost his wife. So he went lonely into the forest to grief. Suddenly with the head rise up he sees Santa Claus walking by. - Santa? he asks. 'Why are you early, it is not even christmas?' - ho, ho. Don't worry about me. Lets worry about you instead' says Santa. What is the problem my friend?' - I lost everything good in my life. I got fired from my job. My wife divorced me. I lost my house.' Santa: I can help you. You can wish three things you want in life and i'll give it to you-' Man: My first wish is i want my house back. Santa: Done! Man: My second wish is i want 1 million amount of cash in my bank account. Santa: Done! Man: My third wish is i also want my job back! Santa: Done, but before i actually give you those wishes, I haft to hump you. Man: Okey. Lets do it. So the Santa claus takes of his pants to hump the man. After they are done humping the santa ask the man: -How old are you? Man: I am 35 years old. Santa: And still believe in Santa Claus??!! HOHOHOHO!!!

in Sadness

why dont asian kids believe in santa clause?

because theyre the ones who made the toys