Christopher jokes
In 1492 Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
He sat on a rock, tickled his cock, until it turned red, white, and blue!
Since Christopher Reeves can't play Superman, they got a new person: Christopher Walken.
What's the opposite of Christopher Walken?
Christopher Reeve.
Christopher and Tony were tempted for a beer, but they only had 2 dollars each.
Christopher got an idea and ran away to the butcher to see if he could get something good. He came back with a sausage. So they went to a pub and ordered 2 beers and 2 whiskeys.
"Are you crazy?!" said Tony to Christopher. "We don't have any money!"
"Take it easy now," said Christopher. "I have a plan."
When they finished drinking everything up, Christopher put the sausage through his own zipper and begged Tony to bend on his knees and take the sausage with his mouth.
The bartender saw what they did and threw them out without even paying. So Christopher and Tony kept doing the same thing pub after pub after pub.
After the 10th pub, Tony said: "I can't do this anymore. I am drunk, and my knees are in too much pain to even handle the walk."
"How do you think I feel?" said Christopher, exhausted. "I dropped the sausage in the 3rd pub!"
Christopher Walkin: "This is a literal universal remote! It actually controls your life! You can pause, you can rewi-"
Me: power button.
What’s black and sits on top of the stairs?
Christopher Reeves in a house fire.
Q: How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
A: She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
What's got 4 legs and is stronger than Superman?
Christopher Reeve's horse.
Christopher's Mom said, "One man's trash is another man's treasure."
Turns out Christopher was adopted.
Joe Rogan to Christopher Doemges: "What can you tell me about musicians of the 18th century?" Doemges: "They're all dead already!"
Yo mama so big, she thought Christopher Rhoades was a tampon.
Chris said to me in P.E. that he likes Jacob, and he said he wants to go straight to the bedroom.
Chris Brown, More like Chris Brownie hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe!
Christopher Columbus: *Sees native Americans* Can I see your land?
Native Americans: Sure, just be care..........
Christopher Columbus: Boonk gang whole lot of gang shit.
What’s the coolest thing about having a 12 year old friend...
You get to meet Chris Hansen!
What name do you get if you mix the names Chris and Marisa?
Then you get the name Chrisa.
