I asked, "Where are your parents?" and oh god, I love working at an orphanage.
I saw a little boy playing alone in the street. I told him that was a bad idea, then asked for his parents.
God, orphanages are fun to work at!!
How do people get skinny?
Their parents don't feed them. (JOKE)
If your baby can unhook your bra, is it time to stop breastfeeding?
I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.
So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.
What’s the most annoying thing about licking bald pussy?
Putting the damn nappy back on afterwards...
What's big, bounces, and makes little kids cry?
My donation to the orphanage :)
What do you call an orphanage?
A parent-less shelter/homeless shelter.
Don't see why people say that babysitting a toddler is hard. You just grease the bathtub, put them inside with some food and drink, and go do your business. I guarantee you that they will still be there when you return.
If you stay in the house, you might need to use sound cancelling headphones too, though.
Baby: Stroll?
Me: *puts baby in stroller* WE'RE GOING ON A STROLL!
Baby: *happily screams*
Stroller: *front wheels break off*
Me: WE'RE GOING ON A STROLL WITH NO FRONT WHEELS!
Baby: Oka- CRASH!
I'm sweating like Michael Jackson at a kindergarten.
Q: What happens to KID who NAPs near a stranger?
A: He gets KID-NAPPED (kidnapped).
We should bully foster parents more for raising parent-less nobodies.
Why do orphans love foster homes?
Because they actually have a home.
Why don't orphans care if they get in trouble? They can't call their parents.
Ah, son of a bitch, I got the truth stuck on my shoe?!?!
The truth: Breast feeding is like having long sex with your baby. God dammit, I hate the truth!
Why can't orphans go on vacation?
The last time they did, they fell in the toilet and had no one to help them out. Ugh!
I saw an orphan crying the other day, so I asked, "Where are your parents?"
God, I love working at an orphanage :)
Mom: Kid, bring your toys and clothing to the car. We're going to Disney Land.
Kid: Ok.
*Bring kid to the orphanage*.
I found a place before called an orphanage, but when I was allowed in there were lots of kids, and I said, "Where's your parents? Oh yeah, you're orphans." Gosh, that was one heck of a day!
