What's the food orphans can't eat?
Family-sized ice cream.
Charity Jokes
What does an orphan have that a homeless person doesn’t?
A home, but what does a homeless person have that orphans don’t?
A parent.
Three nuns are having a charity in front of the church.
A man in a trench coat walks up and flashes the three nuns. The first nun had a stroke, the second nun had a stroke, but the third nun, her arm was too short.
I saw a kid crying in the corner of the room and I said, "Are you OK? Where are your parents?" and he started crying even more.
I love working in an orphanage.
If you watch Jaws backwards, it's a heartwarming story about a shark that gives arms and legs to disabled people.
Every Dorito bag for orphans is family sized.
HIIIIIIIIIII
I LOVE ORPHANS!
What is the biggest disrespect to send a box of tea bags to Africa?
An orphanage is like a horse rescue. You rescue them, rehabilitate them, then sell them for as much as possible.
What do milk and Make-A-Wish kids have in common? They both have expiration dates.
I just donated $100 to a blind children's charity, suck that no one will see it.
After work, I volunteer to help blind children. Verb, not adjective.
I respect anyone who devotes their life to charity work.
But I think Paul Walker went a step too far.
I gave an orphan 5 dollars and I said, "Spend it on a candy bar." I came back 5 minutes later and he didn't have a candy bar. So I look over and I see that he has a piggy bank that has 40 dollars and I said, "Where did you get that?" He said, "For being homeless," and I said, "What are you going to spend it on?" He looked at me and said, "I'm going to pay money for a mother."
What do you call an orphanage that's not an orphanage?
A homeless shelter.
If prostitution had a tax-exempt status, and if an adult bookstore had a tax-exempt status because of a glory hole, churches would have to do something else to keep their tax-exempt status to avoid the risk of going out of business.
Boosterthon asks to raise up to $35,000.
I donate $35,000. I ask, "What's my prize?" Boosterthon worker says, "Here's a headband." Me: "I donated the goal, so is that it?" Boosterthon worker: "No, it's $35,000 per person." I pass out. Boosterthon worker goes back to work like it is a regular day.
I made a house for orphans and...
they had no clue how to use it.
I gave an orphan an iPhone XR because it does not have a home button.
Once I saw a girl crying and asked, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at orphanages.
