Cant jokes
You can't YEE your last HAW!
But I put my BALLS in ur JAW.
Why do cantaloupes always get married in the church?
'Cause they can't elope.
Why is there only a glory hole in the handicapped stall in some public men's restrooms?
Because a gay man that is not physically handicapped can't receive a blow job from a gay man that is physically handicapped under the handicapped stall.
A young boy was talking to his friend about his family:
"My great-grandfather fought against Napoleon, my grandfather fought against the English, my father fought against the Americans, and my uncle against the Argentinians."
The friend replied: "It seems that your family can't get along with anybody!"
What do world hunger and a Mercedes have in common?
Diana can't stop either.
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one liners?
He can't do stand-ups.
Why can't the English play chess? Because they lost their queen. And why can't the US play chess? Because they lost their towers.
Why can’t orphans go to school? Because they don’t have a parent to sign them up.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy."
Why can’t a blind person be a teacher? Because they can’t control their pupils.
Why do orphans suck at baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
When the airplane saw the Twin Towers, it said, "We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we can't go around it, guess we will go through it."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't see home.
Why can't orphans go outside?
Because their parents aren't there to watch them!
I can’t remember if I already said this or not. I might have already said this. Also, this is a true story.
So, I’m walking into a store in Amish country, and there’s this guy with a bear trap. Then my mom’s friend says, "This guy’s gonna catch some bears." Then the Amish guy stops, looks around, and whispers, “It’s for democrats.”
Why can't orphans have sex? Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Your hairline goes so far back that even Gavin, who looks like a monkey, can't see it!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't go to home plate.
Q: Why can't skeletons go to the dance?
A: He doesn't have the guts for it.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home base is.