Calendar jokes
When you're 34, it'll be 420 months before you turn 69 years old.
Hey Siri, skip to Friday!
Why do orphans only have 362 days in a year?
Because they don't have Mothers', Fathers', and Family Day!
What's the difference between you and a calendar?
Calendars got dates.
Why is September 11th the best birthday? No one forgets it!
I told an orphan there were 363 days in a year.
Guy: "Can I tell you a joke?"
Spiderman: "Yes."
Guy: "You only have 11 months on your calendar."
Spiderman: "Why?"
Guy: *holds up knife* "Because I murdered May."
"It's Sunday evening!"
"No. It's Monday eve."
Why did the man get fired from the calendar factory?
He only took a day off.
Why is September 11th the best birthday? Because no one ever forgets it!
"I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered!"
"What time is it?"
"Daytime."
Why do orphans only have 360 days?
Because they don't have Mother's and Father's days.
Why does an orphan's year only have 363 days? Because it's missing Mother's and Father's Day.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Because they don't have Mother's and Father's day.
Orphans have 363 days on a calendar because they don't have Mothers' or Fathers' Day.
Why do orphans only have 363 days in the year?
Because they don’t have a Mother's nor Father’s Day.
Why do orphans only have 363 days of the year?
Because they don't have a Mother's and Father's Day.
Why does Joe only have 264 days in his calendar?
Because he can't celebrate Father's Day.
After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says "WTF!"