Boris jokes

I've patched 1,000 roofs, and they don't call you Boris the roof patcher. I've built 100,000 swords and shields, and they don't call you Boris the blacksmith, but you fuck one goat!

Roses are red, violets are blue, Alexander Boris de Pfeffel had wine and cheese while your loved ones died in the ICU.

A guy in a wheelchair said, "I stand for Boris." But I think he meant he sat for Boris.

Boys: “Hey, can Billy come out and play baseball?”

Mom: “That’s not funny, you know Billy doesn’t have any arms and legs.”

Boys: “I know, we need a third base.”

Do you know Putin?

Put in these balls in your mouth.

Putin's Brain:

What do you call a bear with extreme mood swings? -- A bi-polar-bear.

Russia.