Why do butts always win at poker?
They always hold the best PAIRS!
Why do asses make the best detectives?
They always CRACK the case
Why do rappers make great fishermen?
They always have the best HOOKS.
A guy went to a bar and said to a friend that he found a girl on the railroads and said they had the best sex ever.
His friend asked, "Did you get any head?"
The guy said, "No, I couldn't find it."
What is George Floyd’s? Best pick up line Your breathtaking
My best friend was recently gunned down in a drive-by shooting and died a virgin, but he wasn’t buried one.
Frank: "I am named Frank because my grandpa lived in Frankfurt during his best years."
Finley: "I am named Finley because my grandmother was in Finland during her early twenties!"
Mia: "Can we please change the subject?"
Jill goes home one night with a guy she met at a club. He's tall, super hot, and seems different than most guys she meets. They arrive at his place and head straight to his room. Jill can't help but notice a shelf full of teddy bears. On the bottom are small teddy bears, on the middle are medium-sized teddy bears, and finally, on the top are large teddy bears, all lined up beside each other.
She begins to think that he is sentimental and sweet, and isn't afraid to show it. Her heart melts and she want to give him the best night of his life. She gives him a blowjob, and lets him really give it to her, and even takes it in the rear! In the morning, she slowly gets dressed, and smiles at him and asks, "How was that?" He nods and says, "Not too fuckin' bad at all. Help yourself to a prize on the second shelf!"
Why did the rapper become a fisherman?
Because he wanted to reel in the BEST HOOKS.
God creates dog.
God: "You are man's best friend."
Dog: "That's pretty sexist."
God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"
Dog: "....."
God: "And chocolate kills you!"
Dog: "🐶"
If LAUGHTER is the best medicine, BLESSEDBRIAN'S JOKES are the disease.
Whats the best thing about a prostitute dying on u during sex? The second hour is free
What is the best part about Alabama prostitutes?
Family comes first.
What's the best way to catch a fish? Ask someone to throw it to you.
My girlfriend gave me the best blowjobs, then she grew teeth.
I asked the gym trainer what type of machine I should use to get the best looking women.
He said the ATM outside.
Osama Bin Laden was trying to give me relationship advice.
Probably wasn't the best time to say "OK Boomer."
The best part about Asian jokes is that the only people that can be offended can't see the jokes.
My last best man's speech was like the marriage--short, occasionally funny, and ultimately ruined by the bridesmaid.
In order to get $355 million for his civil fraud case, Donald Trump desperately needed to fundraise. So, in every Republican Party event, he will serve the Patriotic Trump Dog! It consists of an 80-year-old sausage inside a 10-year-old cream bun, topped with Russian dressing.
Trump does have the best people, doesn't he?
