Bad

Bad jokes

Dentist: Open up, sir.

Me: So... I hate my life, my family, my sisters, my dog, my cat, and I tried to take a bath with my toaster, but my dog took it. That's why I hate my dog. And my cat died trying to chew my rope; it choked... Yea.

Dentist: I... meant your mouth... so I can clean your teeth.

Me: :O Ohhhh, my bad.

Dentist: Do you need help??

Me: Yep.

Dentist: ...

Me: ....

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  • I once called a depressed guy [to ask] why he loves ropes so much, and he left HUNGing on the phone. (I'm not English, so I could've talked bad.)

    They told me throwing babies was bad, but guess what I did yesterday? I threw my baby cousin down the escalator.

    Why are orphans bad at basketball?

    Because no one is there for them to pass [the ball].

    We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class and I said, "Man, they are really bad at Jenga!"

    My pencil sharpener when I bleed:

    And I don't really care how bad it hurts. Cause you broke me first.

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