Are jokes
You know what orphans and I have in common? Our dads both left for the milk.
What are the last two words you say after sex before going to sleep?
"Goodnight, Mom!"
Pete the panther was racing a cheetah but lost. The cheetah said, "You can’t beat me, I’m a cheetah." Pete said, "Yeah, you are a cheetah cheetah."
Sometimes women are like bad snacks. People try them and then chuck them in the trash.
POV: You are a passenger on September 11th, 2001, and you see the pilots wearing a Muslim turban.
Memes
Roses are red, violets are blue, You make me pee like I drink tea, you make me go buzz, like becoming a fuzz.
It sticks in, but it goes to the bin, after its use, it will be reused, no it is not what your thinking its -~-(clay)-~-
Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.
Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.
Silence...................punch!
It's better to let someone think you are an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.
What's the only time women are doing real work? When they are giving blow jobs.
Twin Towers are like my parents: 2 left and 1 came back.
To Gwen and Freshfry: Hi Gwen and Freshfry, you have been so amazing to me and now to my sister. You are the people who I look up to. People are mean to us because I am adopted. Thank you for all of your support!
Jerry Garcia: I’m going on a TRIP today!
Bob Weir: Where are you going?
Jerry Garcia: I’m already on it. 😯🦄🌈
Man, we all have the one cool sibling, then the strong sibling, and then you, the one who plays on their iPad or computer all day. Then, when you are on vacation, you are doing nothing at all.
Sandwiches are yummy! 😋
Guys, if you saw a post from someone pretending to be me, don't listen to them.
I'm just going to be out for 3 days, or maybe for a month break. There are a lot of fakers.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
The 9/11 victims. They went through 200 stories.
What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer?
We are both lawyers.
My friend told me to beat that pussy up... so why is the local animal control at my door?
What do orphans and people eating oranges have in common? They both are eating balls.
The cannibal says to the other cannibal, "I like it when humans fall from the sky because then they are meateor."