I have a pen, I have an Apple, um, Apple pen.
The Taliban had a plane, the US had a building boom, 9/11.
Apple Jokes
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apple always gets picked.
Are your parents bakers? Because you're a cutie pie.
Are you a loan? Because you've got my interest.
Is your dad a boxer? Because you’re a knockout!
If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.
Are you an artist? Because you’re really good at drawing me in.
I believe in following my dreams. Can I have your Instagram?
If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.
If you were a flower, you'd be a daaaaaamn-delion!
Today, I was at the Apple Store when I saw that a lot of phones were broken. When I looked around, I saw none other than Pristiano Penaldo smashing all the phones. He said he was mad because he ghosted vs a relegation team. Shame on you, Penaldo!
What did Eve say to Adam?
"That is rock hard."
Why do orphans sit in apple trees?
They wait to be picked.
What's red and has 7 dents? Snow White's cherry.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apples get picked! 🤪
Me: "What's the difference between an apple and an emo?"
Friend: "I don't know."
Me: An apple actually falls from the tree.
One day, someone's ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat, and her ex-boyfriend was there and gave her an apple. Next minute, she had chlamydia. What did the boyfriend do?
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because there's no home.
What is the difference between an apple tray and an orphan? The apples get picked.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple? The apple gets picked.
An orphan, an emo, and an apple are on a tree. The apples get picked unlike the orphan, while the emo kid is already dead from hanging.
What’s the difference between apples and orphans? Apples actually get picked.
Your nose is so big that Apple had to make a custom iPhone that unlocks using Nose ID.
Mommy, Mommy, are you an archer?
"Shut up and keep the apple on your head still."
Why was the apple 🍎 sad?
Because he got his peelings hurt.
What’s the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
What hit the floor first, the emo or the apple? The apple, the rope stopped the emo.
TEST QUESTION: what looks like half an apple?
My cousin: the other half.
