Apology letter jokes

Your mama is so ugly that her birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom company.

The popular girl told me, "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!"

Two weeks later, she shows up pregnant.

...

I guess her rubber broke too.

My birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

Yo momma's so ugly, her birth certificate was an apology letter.

Yo mama so fat, her birth certificate was an apology letter.

Yo mama's so ugly, her birth certificate is an apology letter.

"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing, except at a funeral.

Someone told me that you can let out all your anger by writing letters about everyone you hate and then burning them... But I was just wondering... should I keep the letters?

I was having issues in my personal and professional life. I hated everyone. I was on the brink of a mental breakdown and depression. I decided to see a therapist about it. The therapist suggested that I should write letters to the people I hate and then burn them. I must admit I feel much better...

But now I don't know what to do with the letters.

I keep getting these letters from this little girl every year on Father's Day. I told the orphanage to stop letting her send these.

If you don't like my suicidal jokes, sorry man, didn't know it cut that deep.