And jokes

A man walks into a bar... and he never walks out.

What's the difference between Madeleine McCann and a boomerang?

The boomerang is guaranteed to come back.

There are 2 dads and 2 sons. They all caught a fish.

Why did they only come home with 3 fish?

(Answer)

There were a grand-dad, dad, and son.

If you don't get it, then it means grand father is the dad to the dad (1 dad). Dad is the dad for the son and a son for the grandfather. Get it?

You’re so short, you must need a ladder to reach your advice and dreams.

What is the difference between chocolate and sex?

I would rather eat the chocolate first and then make love.

Your computer just went in my bathroom and took a shit because you put too much chili in the bowl.

If you are a big fan of me, go to the movie and I kill the bad guys. If you don't, I will be mad and I will be sonic.exe lol.

A blind man walks into a bar...

And then a chair.

And then a table.

What do you say to your pet when you're super tired, slow, and worn out?

"I'm totally dogging it today..."

People are fighting in a war, and a man gets hit four times in the arm and says, "'Tis but a scratch!"

And the other guy, looking at him in shock, says, "A scratch? Your arm is off your body!"

What do you cross with a cow and a tiger? (mooigter)

Hi, this is Chloe, and I am about to tell you about my joke.

Why did the cow cross the road? Because to get to the other side.

Why is there A/C in hospitals?

So the vegetables stay nice and fresh.

What is the difference between a human and a tree? A human being is the one who can drive.

What time is it when you get home, can walk walk home and walk walk home from school?

What time is it when you get home and you walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school? Oooooo day, a great night for

Hi 👋 I love 💕 you walk in and out oon.

Hi 👋 I love 💗 you walk in and out the door 🚪 night. I did not have time today. I was just a little bit and I had to walk home from home after dinner. I

I did a walk today, but it was so much better, and a walk home. I had dinner. Night was good fun at home. Night was good night. I was a little off, but you were so fun to be a night.

What is the difference between a human being and a tree?

A human being can walk, and a tree can’t walk.