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Masturbation

Why have I not seen these posters in my neighbourhood?

A poster on a wooden pole reads "Pleasuring yourself with a vape? Try masturbation instead. Masturbation alone or with a friend is a great safe alternative to vaping." There is also a website "WhatsInAVape.com" and "THE REAL COST" on the poster.

Nicotine

A sign on a clipboard reads "Suck dick" above a crossed-out image of a vape pen, and the words "NOT NIC!" appear below.

Microwave

The image shows a Minecraft landscape filled with red rocks and a body of water. There are several blocks of TNT laid out in the foreground. The text overlay reads "My microwave stopped working, time to use my pc to cook some beef."

Fuel

A tweet that says "garfields cum can be used as an alternative fuel if you consider my asshole a vehicle."

Tea

☕️

A Google search bar shows the query "Should I kill someone, or have a cup of tea?" The "Did you mean" suggestion is "Should I kill someone, and have a cup of tea?" Below this is the text "Ah, yes, my mistake. Thank you." and an image of a person sipping tea next to a British flag.

Masturbation

A screenshot of a Reddit post from r/Kanye, labeled NSFW. The title asks, 'Is it still ethical to jiggle my johnson to Kanye songs?' The body text below is a 'DISCUSSION' post starting with 'A while ago, I discovered that certain Kanye songs caused me to become ithyphallic...' and continues with a lengthy description of the user's masturbation habits, influenced by Kanye West's music and recent controversies. It ends by asking for an alternative suggestion like 'Jordan Terrell Carter'.

Response

How to say “I love you” be like :

The image shows six different cartoon characters and their alternative responses to the phrase "I love you". The first character, a yellow X, says "Thanks". The second character, a blue 4, is laughing nervously. The third character, a green 2, says "Who doesn't?". The fourth character, a gray 8, says "Why?". The fifth character, a black 7, says "YEET". The sixth character, a blue 6, says "A horrible decision, really."

Place

A screenshot of the Wikipedia page for Goochland, Virginia. It includes a photograph of the Goochland County Courthouse, a map showing the location of Goochland in Virginia, and information about the area's geography and population.

Steal

A red-armored Space Marine from Warhammer 40,000 is shown holding a bolter. Above him, the letters "S.T.E.A.L." are prominently displayed. Below him, the text clarifies: "(Strategic Transfer of Equipment to Alternate Locations)."

Jokes

Day

After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "What are you going to do now?"

God said, "I think I'm going to call it a day."

Drink

What's an Emo's favorite drink?

Water, JK it's cyanide.

Emo

Whatever happened to the emo? (wrong answer only)

Alternative jokes