Adolescent jokes
Circumcision is like getting your dick sucked by a female. If you did not like it when you were a teenager, you probably will not like it when you become an adult.
I got detention for giving an emo kid a happy meal.
What do you call a flat-chested emo? A cutting board.
What do apples and depressed kids have in common?
They both hang on trees.
A dad tells his son, "Stop masturbating! If you do it too long, you will go blind."
The son replied, "Dad, I'm over here!"
I wish my lawn was emo, so I would not have to cut it, it would cut itself.
Why did the boy study for his math test in a tree?
'Cause he wanted higher grades.
What do you call a 17-year-old orphan?
Homeless.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
What happened when the emo tried to high five a tree?
It left him hanging.
What do you call a group of teenage emos?
Suicide squad.
What is the difference between acne and a priest?
Acne waits for a boy to turn twelve before it comes on his face.
I have eaten 6 babies, 9 adolescent children, and 2 infants in the past week ;p
A 10-year-old: "I don't want to smile without having a reason to. People shouldn't think I'm happy 24/7."
A 10-year-old, a week later: "Damn... my life is shitty..."
<2 years later> 12-year-old: "What is de-pre-ssion?" *googles it*
Now 14-year-old: "Oh..."
As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.
Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.
God: Ok, so I created adults. And I created how they are supposed to look from being born to preteen.
Satan: (slides in) I’ll take over for you, pops.
God: I dunno... this is very delicate work. Just one wrong thing can ruin the system.
Satan: Don’t worry your beard off! (Pats his back) I’ll just do the ages from 12 to 18!
God: Hmm... I’m still not- (Gets a call on his phone) Shoot, I got to take this. (Answers call) Don’t touch anything, Lucifer! (Walks away)
Satan:.......(just touches lightly, and alarms start blaring. He squeaks and runs away)
God: (rushes in) WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!?!
God: (tries fixing problems. Only gets alarms off) Fuck me........
God:....(sighs) Fine, it’ll stay. We’ll just call it....puberty.
What is the difference between American teenage girls and Muslim teenage girls? -- American teenage girls get stoned *before* they have sex.
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
