Abortion clinic jokes

What attracted Jeffrey Dahmer to abortion clinics?

- He smelled veal.

Q. What's the difference between an abortion clinic and a nursery? A. The abortion clinic won't let you take the baby home.

Yo mama so slutty the abortion clinic gave her a loyalty card and coupon for 20% off her next abortion.

What do you call a black abortion clinic?

Crime Stoppers.

Q. What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?

Abortion clinics don't do deliveries.

I walked in on my dad fucking my little brother. I don't know what was worse: the fact that he was fucking my brother, or the fact that the abortion clinic let my parents take the fetus home....

Hi! Welcome to Papa John's abortion clinic, where yesterday's meat is today's treat. How may I be of service?

Mamma mia abortion clinic!

Your loss is our sauce.

Abortion clinics are kind of like NAZI gas chambers. Less people come out than go in.

You wanna know how to get rid of potential scam callers?

Next time you get a call from them, just answer the phone and say, "Pizza Hut abortion clinic, where yesterday's loss is today's sauce, how may I help you?"

Hi, welcome to Mario's pizzeria/abortion clinic.

Where no fetus can beat us, and your loss is our sauce.

Q: What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?

A: The abortion clinic doesn't deliver.

Hello, This is Jimmy from Jimmy's Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic! Your next loss is our next sauce! How many pizzas do you need?

This is Riley abortion clinic. Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.

Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,

answer the phone with this:

"Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"

or

"Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"

Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.

(sorry in advance this joke is brutal)

What has 12 heads and 24 eyes?

The bin at the back of the abortion clinic.

What's the difference between an abortion clinic and a computer? Ctrl+Alt+Delete.

When someone calls you, say "Welcome to Joe's Pizza Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce."

Joe's pizzeria and abortion clinic.

Yesterday's loss is today's sauce.

If someone calls you, just say:

"This is Peter's abortion clinic and pizza restaurant, where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!"