9 jokes

What do 9/11 and gender have in common?

They used to be two, and now it's a sensitive topic.

What do maths and 9/11 have in common?

They both prove two parallel lines can be intercepted by a plane.

What's good about 9/11? It helped solve the world's overpopulation issue.

A Story:

I lived in a small house. Behind my house was a big forest. If I went in the forest, then I heard scary sounds. That was very dreadful. I had a son. He was 9 years old. One day he went into the forest and did not come back. I called the police, but it couldn't help. I went looking. I really wanted my son Robby back. I missed him so! With a flashlight and compass, I went into the dark, eerie forest. Then the noises came again, but this time I also heard a scream. A scream from a nine year old child. It was Robby, certainly! I stopped in front of a tunnel.

Sequel follows...

What died on 9/11?

2,996 people.

Who are the fastest readers in the world?

Answer: 9/11 victims. They went through 80 stories in 5 seconds.

I don't like it when people make jokes about 9/11, because we lost 19 great patriots that day.

Who are the world's fastest readers?

9/11 victims. 100 stories in 11 seconds.

1. If being ugly was a crime, you would have a life sentence.

2. My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships.

3. There is a tree out there giving you oxygen, and you owe that tree an apology.

4. I don’t hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone.

5. When I saw your dad on the sidewalk, I didn’t laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

6. If I had powers, I would make you the dumbest person alive, but it seems life already beat me to the punch.

7. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it.

8. If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I’d be broke.

9. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting.

10. Were you born on a highway, 'cause that’s where most accidents happen?

11. Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya.

12. You're the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented.

What’s my favorite Islamic Holiday... 9/11.

Why were the people during 9/11 mad because they ordered pepperoni sandwiches, but they got two planes?

What hit the ground first in 9/11? The people.

Subway trying to commemorate 9/11: CRASH INTO SUBWAY THIS SUBTEMBER 11TH TO GET 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR ONLY $9.11, THAT'S 2 FOOTLONG SUBS FOR $9.11 AND WATCH THEM FALL... INTO YOUR MOUTH!

Who are the fastest readers?

9/11 victims, they did 98 stories in 10 seconds.

Are you a building?

Cuz I rate you 9/11.

The time is 9:11, time to put your phones on airplane mode.

One of my family members died on 9/11, he was one of the best pilots in the Middle East.

You know, 9/11 jokes aren't funny, they're just PLANE wrong!

At 9/11, the people in the Twin Towers ordered pizza. They asked for pepperoni, but instead got plane.

You shouldn't joke about 9/11. My grampa died on 9/11. He was the best pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.