9 jokes
What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?
A cat has nine lives, and a frog croaks every day.
How do you tell an Indian person from a Muslim?
Are you 7/11 or 9/11?
My dad died in 9/11. He was a Muslim pilot.
Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.
I hate 9/11 jokes... They always crash and burn, like, dude, it's not funny?
Why was 10 afraid? Because he was 'tween 9 and 11.
Why is every number scared of 7?
Because 7 "ate" 9.
What's good about 9/11? It helped solve the world's overpopulation issue.
A Story:
I lived in a small house. Behind my house was a big forest. If I went in the forest, then I heard scary sounds. That was very dreadful. I had a son. He was 9 years old. One day he went into the forest and did not come back. I called the police, but it couldn't help. I went looking. I really wanted my son Robby back. I missed him so! With a flashlight and compass, I went into the dark, eerie forest. Then the noises came again, but this time I also heard a scream. A scream from a nine year old child. It was Robby, certainly! I stopped in front of a tunnel.
Sequel follows...
What died on 9/11?
2,996 people.
I hate when people make jokes about the Twin Towers.
My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.
My uncle died on 9/11. At least he died doing what he loved, flying planes.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
Answer: 9/11 victims. They went through 80 stories in 5 seconds.
I don't like it when people make jokes about 9/11, because we lost 19 great patriots that day.
Who are the world's fastest readers?
9/11 victims. 100 stories in 11 seconds.
1. If being ugly was a crime, you would have a life sentence.
2. My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships.
3. There is a tree out there giving you oxygen, and you owe that tree an apology.
4. I don’t hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone.
5. When I saw your dad on the sidewalk, I didn’t laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
6. If I had powers, I would make you the dumbest person alive, but it seems life already beat me to the punch.
7. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it.
8. If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I’d be broke.
9. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting.
10. Were you born on a highway, 'cause that’s where most accidents happen?
11. Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya.
12. You're the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented.
Q: What is the difference between two bottles of Whiskey and 2 pretty feminist girls?
A: You don't leave the bottles in the cold and dark forest after you and your 9 friends are finished with them.
What’s my favorite Islamic Holiday... 9/11.
Why were the people during 9/11 mad because they ordered pepperoni sandwiches, but they got two planes?
When 9/11 happened, we changed our airport policies. When school shootings happen, we haven't changed anything since the shooting at Columbine in 1999. And we say we want the children to be safe.