Watermelon

Watermelon Jokes

Ball

Your balls are so big, when people see you at the market, they think it's watermelon.

Hippie

What do eating a watermelon, rolling a cigarette, and eating a hippie chick out have in common?

Spit, spit, spit!

Friend

My friend and I joined a french fry eating contest, but I just couldn't ketchup. So we switched to cheeseburgers, but I still couldn't mustard up the speed to lettuce win. I mayo not have thought this through.

So we switched to fruits, but when it got to the watermelons, I started to feel a little green. My friend couldn't seed the point of us continuing anymore. I just couldn't digest the stress, I guess! :D

Fruit

We almost drowned when we went out boating, but I got a watermelon to keep me floating.

Friend

Your friend took a shower and used Pantene, but I got a watermelon to keep me clean.

Orphan

What's the difference between a watermelon and an orphan?

One you cut into 2 with a knife.

And the watermelon you cut into pieces.

Baby

How are babies and watermelons similar?

They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides.

Hooker

What's the difference between a dead hooker and a watermelon?

The watermelon didn't scream when I sliced it.

Difference

What is the difference between a baby and a watermelon?

One is a refreshing summertime snack; the other one is a watermelon.

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  • Difference

    What is the difference between a small child and a watermelon?

    One I eat on the daily and the other is a watermelon.