Vs jokes
What’s the difference between an orphan’s parents and a boomerang?
The boomerang came back.
What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?
Your job still sucks!
Why is it called scissoring and not lip-syncing?
What is the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One to trust and the other to thrust.
What’s the difference between a nun and a hooker?
One kneels for salvation.
The other kneels with salivation.
What’s the difference between my sister-in-law and a driveway?
I pull out of the driveway.
What's the difference between a hipster and a hockey player? A hockey player changes his pads every third period.
What's the difference between Nickelback and a nickel?
A nickel is actually metal.
What’s the difference between kids and drugs?
I don’t hide drugs in my basement.
Smoking a fag in Britain: 🚬
Smoking a fag in America: hate crime.
What’s something you can say to a waiter, but not your wife?
"Does this come with anything?"
It is September. What's the difference between a stage four colon cancer patient and Santa Claus? Santa is coming for Christmas!
What's the difference between vitiligo and plastic surgery?
Vitiligo doesn't alter facial features.
What's the difference between a child and a cancer diagnosis? At least the cancer grows up and leaves eventually.
What’s the difference between anal and oral sex?
Oral sex makes your day. Anal makes your hole weak.
What’s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can’t hear an enzyme.
What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?
One’s a Good Year, the other’s a great year.
What's the difference between hungry and horny?
Where you stick the cucumber.
What’s the difference between a man and a margarita?
A margarita hits the spot every time.
What's the difference between a Corvette and a pile of dead babies?
I don't have a Corvette in my garage.