What did the toaster say to the toast?”i want you inside me”
You like bread toasted? That means you're roasted.
One day, I'm going to Malta to a big hotel. In the morning, I go down to eat breakfast. I tell the waitress I want two pieces of toast. She brings me only one piece. I tell her I want a piece. She says, "Go to the toilet." I say, "You don't understand. I want a piece on my plate." She says, "You better not piss on your plate, you son of a bitch." I don't even know the lady, and she calls me a son of a bitch.
I don't need this shit!!
Later, I go to eat at the big restaurant. The waitress brings me a spoon and a knife, but no fork. I tell her I wanted a fork. She tells me everyone wanna fuck. I say, "You don't understand, I want a fork on my table." She says, "You better not fuck on the table, you son of a bitch." I don't even know the lady, and she calls me a son of a bitch.
I don't need this shit!
So, I go back to my room in a hotel, and there are no sheets on the bed. I call the manager and tell him I want a sheet. He tells me, go to the toilet. I say, "You don't understand, I want a sheet on my bed." He says, "You better not shit on my bed, you son of a bitch."
I go to the checkout, and the man at the desk says, 'Peace on you.' I say, 'Piss on you too, you son of a bitch. I'm going back to Italia. Arrivederci!'
I don't need this shit!
Moral of the story, don't go to Australia with a Korean accent.
What’s the difference between God and Hitler?
God made thousands of bread, Hitler made thousands of toast.
What did the bread photographer say to the toast? Say, "Toasted cheese!"
Bread?
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Bagel."
"Bagel who?"
"Toast, it's me, your arch-nemesis, Bagel, here to make up! Bye!"
I was looking forward to some toast...
So I took the toaster in the bath with me.
What do orphans use to make breakfast? My ass! 🤣🤣
Beans and toast
Personally, I think putting beans on toast is better than bullets in children.
A man was having a dream. He dreamt about a mystical creature that was commonly known as the god of toast.
When the man woke up, he turned to tell his wife about the dream. When he delivers the "toast god" punchline, his wife shrugged as she faced the opposite direction to the man.
The man turned around also and started sobbing as he realised his marriage is in shambles.
Roses are red.
Roses are red.
Roses are red.
I smell burnt toast.
Say "toast" three times. Spell "toast" three times. What do you put in a toaster? The answer?