Taxonomy jokes
Why aren't koalas actual bears?
Because they don't meet the koalafications.
Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications.
If my cat was a cactus, doesn't that make him a catus?
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Sinocyclocheilus anophthalmus.
Trees are so social. They're always branching out.
One day a father and a daughter were at a park. The daughter accidentally kills a butterfly. The father says, "Just because you killed the butterfly, you don't get butter for a week."
They were there the next day, and the daughter kills a cockroach. The father laughs and says, "Nice try."
Why do bees have sticky hair? They always use honeycombs.
Asked my dad what LGBT stands for.
He started with "Lettuce? Bacon. Tomato. What's the 'g' for?" Obviously, I had to reply with "Garnish."
Do trees shit?
Well, how else would we get #2 pencils?