SOS jokes

You know what's so horrible about this website?

When I mimic another person's account, the picture ALWAYS changes color. No more identity theft for me.

Your hairline is so fat that when you meet Santa, you're fatter than him and your mom.

Yo mama so fat, she sat next to everyone on the plane.

Your hairline is so ugly, like your mum.

One day, there was an ugly barnacle. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end!

Why do orphans have no parents?

Because they are so fucking useless!

My friend told me that he saw a yacht went close in to the yeti's eye, so I said to my friend, "Did the yeti kiss?" But my friend said, "No, the yeti have to play games every single day, or the yeti will die."

Yo mama eats so much that she spends her whole life on the toilet.

Why did Zayn Malik get his girlfriend to convert to Islam? So she can declare GiGIHADid.

Yo mama so fat, everytime she has to use the world's largest knife.

Bro, your head is so big that it shines so bright, it turns into a lightbulb.

I called my sister a party pooper after she came to my party uninvited.

Grampa said that the only ones who poop at parties are the ones who don't get invited.

So I guess that means I was the party pooper at my own birthday?

You're so short, you have to yell to talk to people!

Yo forehead so big that when I asked Vegeta how big it is, he said “IT’S OVER 9000!”

Why do orphans play baseball?

So they can touch home.

You're so fat, when you say the n-word, boogers come out.

Yo mama so fat that when she went to take a crap... she couldn't even take a crap!

John walked into Pat at the barn. He was dancing naked in front of a tractor. John said, "Hey, Pat, what are you doing?"

Pat said, "Well, me and the wife have been having a bit of trouble in bed, so I went to a therapist, and he said I should do something sexy to a tractor (attract her)."

Your hairline is so big, it was used as a highway.

I love Stephen Hawking jokes so much because they roll off the tongue so nicely.