SOS jokes

Your hairline is so big, I couldn't find the area of it on Jupiter.

Your hairline is so ugly, it’s receding from your face to never see you.

You're so bald that Disney uses your head for movie scripts.

When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.

Why is it so cheap to throw a party at a haunted house? Because the ghosts bring all the boos.

My wife asked me the other day where I got so much candy. I said, "I always have a few Twix up my sleeve."

Why'd the alternate universe Spider-Man do so well on his driving test? He's an excellent parallel Parker.

I don't get why bakers aren't wealthier. They make so much dough.

Your mama is so nasty.

She showed up to Red Lobster with her own crabs.

I remember my first day back when working at a camp. I was so surprised when the trains arrived.

So you're offended by midget jokes? C'mon, grow up!

Yo mama is so ugly, when she went for plastic surgery, they accidentally gave her face a Brazilian Butt Lift!

This was a few months ago. I used to help people load and unload inventory. One day I’m driving home after having lunch with my sister, and she asked if we can stop at the next gas station. I told her, "So you can weigh yourself on the truck scale?"

Daveon says, "Oh wow, she's so beautiful!" The doctor then says, "Yes, but sadly, your wife didn't make it..." Daveon then states, "Give me the one my wife made then!"

Why did the rapper wear sunglasses to the concert?

Because his lyrics were so fire, he needed protection!

Yo mama is so dumb, when she had a brain scan, the result was 404...

Yo mama is so dumb, she spent all her money on free subscriptions!

Yo mama is so clumsy, when she had her first kickboxing lesson, she kicked herself in the testicles.

"Mhm... So you're gay?" -Darling

Roses are red, violets are blue; blood's thicker than water, so yeah, I got you.