What's the difference between the milkman and my dad?
Nothing, they are both one thing except he never returns with milk.
(I've been eating cereal with water COMBINATION!)
I think my dad's gay because he goes out with his mates to get milk but never returns.
A man walked into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian said, "No, you won’t return it."
What's the difference between Madeline McCann and Batman?
Batman returns.
Man, I had a joke, but it left and never came back.
What is the difference between a woman and ice? The ice always comes back.
What's the similarity between my son and a rug from eBay? I asked for a refund.
My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."
Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.
What animal has five legs? A pitbull returning from a playground.
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
Answer: A boomerang, because it is the only thing that comes back to them.
This guy walks into a library one day and asks the librarian for a book on how to commit suicide.
The librarian says, "F*** no, you won’t return it!"
How is an orphan like a boomerang?
They always come back!
This joke is unavailable due to the National Period of Mourning. Please return to this page on the 19th of September.
R.I.P. Queen Elizabeth II. 1926-2022.
A boy asks his father:
"What is politics?"
Father answers:
"It’s very simple! You see, I bring in the money, so I’m big business. Your mother spends the money, so she’s the government.
Your grandfather sees to it that everything is managed in an orderly way. So he’s the law.
Our maid is the working class.
Everything revolves around your interests, so you’re the people. Your little baby brother represents the future."
The boy has to think it over. That night he hears his little brother crying due to a dirty diaper. He doesn’t know what to do, so he goes to the bedroom of his parents. There his mother is sound asleep. He goes to the bedroom of the maid, but his father is there fucking the maid — and oddly enough his grandfather is watching through the window.
Nobody notices the boy and he returns to his bed.
The next day his father asks him:
"So, can you now explain to me what politics is?"
The boy says:
"Yes, it’s all become clear to me!
Big business screws over the working class while the law watches and the government sleeps. The people are ignored and the future lies in shit."
I forgot what a boomerang was. Oh well, it’ll come back to me.
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it actually came back.
Why is it that orphans love Frisbees so much?
Because they return eventually.
Why do orphans hate dad jokes? They never return.
I think I am a boomerang because I always come back to you.
The farmers were playing chess, and the winner shouted and said: "I killed your horse!"
The second quickly left, and when he returned he said: "We have poisoned all your cows!"
