Restaurant jokes
Why is there no toilet paper at KFC?
Because it's finger lickin' good!
What is China's favorite restaurant?
The Pet Store.
You look like a burger.
I walked in a sushi bar, and the sushi chef looked very o-fish-all!
McDonald's :)
You're at a buffet, you think you're hungry for two, but misfortune happens when you think of yourself. You get stuck looking at sides in the buffet. A roly poly gal you see in the corner of your eye, eyeballing the main dishes in front at the end. You go in for the pickings, you get intercepted by a far more hungrier matter, but you find yourself getting slammed over the buffet table, and realize you are gasping for air, and she is tenderizing you for dinner.
How many line cooks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Three. One to do it, and two to say that they did it better at the previous restaurant they were at.
Where does a girl with one leg work?
IHOP.
Jeffrey Dahmer was eating at 5 Guys before it was a restaurant.
A man walks into a diner one day, walks up to the counter, and proceeds to order a bowl of chili.
The waitress says that the man sitting next to him just ordered the last bowl they had. That man was just sitting there, not eating the chili.
After watching him not eating for a while, the first man asks him, "Are you going to eat that?"
The second man replies, "No, you can have it if you want."
So the first man takes the bowl and starts eating.
About halfway through the bowl, he's chewing when he feels a crunch. He looks down only to see half a dead rat sitting in the chili.
He immediately throws all of it up, back into the bowl.
The second man looks at him and says, "Yeah, that's about as far as I got too."
Have you eaten at the restaurant on the Moon? It's got good food, but no atmosphere.
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's logo!
A ham sandwich walks into a bar, and orders a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve food here."
What did the chef say to the skeleton?
"Bone appetit!"
Mom: Hey, there's IHOP.
Kid: You hop to.
Two sticks of butter walk into a butter bar. One says to the other, "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" He replies, "Sure, dis my butter from another utter."
What did one alligator say to the other alligator?
"Let’s go for an all-in-one buffet!"
What do McDonalds and priests both do?
They both put their meat between 10-year-old buns.
A girl and a boy were on a date. The boy kept farting. The girl asked, "What is wrong?!?". The boy replied, "Explosive diarrhea.". The girl said, "Ew".
The boy went to the bathroom, and the place exploded. The center of the explosion, the bathroom.
This guy walked into a pizzeria and ordered a water. The owner called him an idiot.
His girlfriend walked in and ordered a pineapple pizza.
The guy left her, and the owner made her leave.