Remorse jokes

Roses are red. He shows no remorse.

Santa Claus Has joined the terrorist force.

"The rise of atheism is going to lead to a break down of social morals and lead to all kinds of filth, including an increase in child abuse," said the village priest.

The village scientists did some fact checking. In prison, they found roughly 70% of child abusers were hyper religious before committing the crimes, and another 20% converted to religions to look 'remorseful'. The remaining 10% preferred not to say. They presented the findings to the media.

"Scientists slander good religious folk and ignore the weight of evidence!"

"Is Science biased against religion? You decide in this survey," they reported.

The village priest is living at his majesty's convenience and tells the others he committed armed robbery.

"Why is this a joke? It's not even funny!" said the person reading this, breaking the forth wall.

What is funny is you got to the end of this post and didn't cringe. Why not?

"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing, except at a funeral.

My ex got into a bad accident recently. I told the doctors the wrong blood type. Now she will really know what rejection feels like.

The last thing I told my ex after we broke up was, "At least we're still cousins!" 😂

One time, I broke up with my Roblox girlfriend by sending her a message. Thirty seconds later, I heard my uncle crying in the next room.

What can you say to make a rape victim feel better?

"It will be over soon."