If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
So, there was a male whale and a female whale swimming through the ocean. One day the male whale sees a ship and says, "That's the ship that killed my parents!" So they go to the ship and blow the ship over and throw the men overboard into the sea.
The male whale sees the man who killed his parents and he was still alive, so he opened his mouth and went for the man, but out of nowhere the female whale yells, "Hey!! I was in it for the blowjob, but I'm not gonna eat seamen!"
Are your parents bakers? Because you're a cutie pie.
Are you a loan? Because you've got my interest.
Is your dad a boxer? Because you’re a knockout!
If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.
Are you an artist? Because you’re really good at drawing me in.
I believe in following my dreams. Can I have your Instagram?
If you were a fruit, you’d be a fine-apple.
If you were a flower, you'd be a daaaaaamn-delion!
I saw an orphan on the street. I said, "Where are your parents?" He cried and said, "My mum and dad died in a car crash!" 😆😆😂😂🤣
What is a kid's favorite thing to do with their dad?
Play pretend dog in the bed.
I got in trouble in school today. The teacher said, "I'm gonna call your parents!"
I said, "Let me know when you find them." <3
What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?
The second-hand book was loved once.
I copied my friend's work. It's not like the teacher can tell my parents.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not your dad.
Why can't Oregon go to the doctor?
Because they need parents' signature.
A man sees a small boy begging for money. He walks up to him and asks him if he is an orphan.
The boy asks, "What gave me away?"
The man responds, "Your parents."
My ex was an orphan as a child.
I should have taken that as the first sign.
If her parents didn't want her, why would I?
Why can’t orphans go to the hospital? The front desk always asks, “Where are your parents?”
I saw a little girl crying, and I said, "Where are your parents?" That day, I got fired from the orphanage. 🤪
Why can’t an orphan go to a youth church? Because they need a parent to pick them up.
I see a kid crying in the park, right? So I go up to him and say, "Hey, where are your parents?" and he says, "Well, my dad left to get the milk and never came back, and my mother died in a plane crash in the Bermuda Triangle."
There is gonna be a huge party at the orphanage tonight because the parents ain't home.
One day this kid says to his dad, "Dad, they bully me at school."
His dad asks why, and the kid says, "They bully me because I got no hands."
Then his dad says, "Who would do such a thing like that? I want to know who they are. Point at them!"
Why did the orphan go to the playground?
To see if it could find its parents.
I found your parent!
