Official

Official jokes

Penaldo

Official Dj Penaldo playlist.

1. "I'm a fraud" 2. "I need you (ft. Tap-ins)" 3. "I Want to Leave Mid United" 4. "Back where I belong (ft. Europa league)" 5. "TY Eder" 6. "Nobody wants me (Rejectnaldo Remix)" 7. "Fuck that kid (ft. Lil Broke phone)" 8. "Sewy (Benched +arms crossed version)"

Brother

Today was the worst day ever! My brother got run over, and I lost my driver's license!

Flag

Official flag of Great Britain? The Union Jack.

Official flag of Australia? The Southern Cross.

Official flag of Canada? The Maple Leaf.

Official flag of Japan? The Sun.

Official flag of Orange County, California? The Nazi Symbol.

Income

According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income-tax form consists of only four lines:

1. What was your income for the year?

2. What were your expenses?

3. How much have you left?

4. Send it in.

Memes

Number

I heard that the numbers on the front of your credit card represent the number of minutes until you meet the πŸ’• love of your life!πŸ’•

And the 3 numbers on the back represent the month and day you make it official!!

Comment those numbers to lock it in!!πŸ˜„

Fraud

I was on the Official Cristiano Ronaldo website when suddenly my Anti-Virus software showed an alert on my screen! The notification read "WARNING: FRAUD DETECTED!" I was shocked but not surprised.

Penaldo has been finished for years after all, and he often ghosts in big games.

Friend

Thanks Ethan for all you've done. We've both made mistakes when all is said and done, but just thanks for being a good friend. This is officially my last post on here, Ethan-Real 1.

School

Why are all these pathetic jokes about school shootings?πŸ˜’ You all are so fucking pathetic... Humanity is officially gone, stupid bitches...

Bomb

I wanted to bomb a restaurant, so I went in there with a bomb, but the bomb got diffused and did not work.

I asked a person standing nearby. I said, "Hey, do you know how to fix this bomb so I can blow up this place?"

He gave me a book.

It was the Quran.

I said, "What the hell is that?"

He said, "This is the official manual for bomb making."

Weight

Yo mama’s official weight (in tonnes)

99593927273949592827385959599282738595939282759593827395828192948472937593817294728275957292739584728459398284854982835884838285849292857483838385838294958483823884958383947391959593817495827394858272959573939488492949595837829374758483848497483919396849294858203957293858930375938475937393949292949848215722935375838283848382883839393949583929459939294949493928174759284759927495910305838385848292958293959.

Plunger

A fact! I think I'm officially a poo-buster, as the plunger does look like the weapon in "Ghostbusters"!

Career

OFFICIAL

Pionnel Pessi's tracklist leaked!

1. Neymar gave me a career. 2. Lewandowski finished me. 3. 8-2 4. I own Elche. 5. I am a fraud (ft. Pyllian Mpappe) 6. 10m 7. I fled La Liga 8. Want to be Ronaldo. 9. Long live Bolivia. 10. Wind man

Memes

Community

I've officially hit 10,000 comments within like 2 weeks of making this account. It's official folks, I am unemployed as FUCK

@matt, we needs mods. Ppl say you spend more time on Sw than here and idk if that's true, but with the lack of you, and the Mods you oversee. We really do need them. I probably don't need to do this, but in my eye a request is more lightly meaningful the more evidence you give, so here are the main reasons, (in no particular order) and who is the most trustworthy and eligible for being a Mod, I'm my eyes, and I'd li… Read more

WE DID IT!! The Explain Bear cult has officially revived the site, all thanks to Blach and I, MAY THE WINNING PERSIST!!!!