No jokes

"Nun" means no one likes them. Just take off that dumb hood!

Tell the person next to you to spell "me." When they do, say, "You forgot the D." They should respond with, "There is no D in ME." You say, "Not yet." If this does not go as planned, well, then you are fucked for life.

Why can orphans never walk home?

Because there's no way to go.

Why is an orphan's favorite movie Spider-Man: No Way Home?

South Tower: Man, that was da bomb.

North Tower: No, that was da plane.

(The plane) we can’t go over it, we can’t go under it. Oh no, we have to go through it.

One day my kid with no arms came up to me and said, "Mom, what's dark humor?" I thought about it, then said, "Go wave to that blind person." He just looked at me, confused, but angry.

Reverend Mother walks into the convent and announces:

"Sisters, our carrots have been delivered!"

Nuns exclaim: "Hurray! Carrots!"

Reverend Mother: "They are grated carrots, though."

Nuns: "Ugh! No, thank you then..."

An orphan comes up to me and says, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."

Yo mama so fat that when she went to the fatty competition, they said no because they didn't want professionals.

Yo mama so fat that when she went to the fatty competition, they said no because they didn't want professionals.

(Just a joke, she's probably kind.)

Yo mama is so lazy that the only letters she knows are "NO".

Poultry rape is no joke. It is God's gift to those who want a laugh.

There’s a lot of talk about starting families, but no one ever talks about finishing what they started.

Yo mamma's so fat no one was laughing, but the ground was cracking up.

Person with no arms: Even though I have no arms, I can do anything you guys can.

Me: If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏 If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏

Person with no arms: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Why are there no chemists in Africa?

Because you can’t take tablets on an empty stomach.

Father talks to his 5-year-old son: “No, Petie, you don’t have to worry. There is no monster sleeping under your bed. It sleeps every day in the bed next to me.”

What do you call a 5th grader with no friends?

Sandy Hook survivor.

Difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?

Nothing, no one cares how much lead is in those kids.