Your mom is so fat that she thought Eminem is a candy.
I play saxophone, and I like to tell everyone I am a registered s/o (short for saxophone operator) in hopes of one day starting a jazz band, but now everyone looks at me weird, and when I go to house parties to perform, everyone hides their children, but little do they know I LOVE children. For some reason, I got multiple restraining orders because I said, “I want to touch the kids so they can one day become musicians themselves... like Michael Jackson.” I have then since moved from my hometown to Florida, where I can meet up with other s/o’s, and surprisingly, they have similar stories to me, but they say they have never even touched a saxophone, but they do like touching kids, which I’m all down for, just me and my buddies showing the new youth their abilities.
Update: i figured out what they meant by s/o is not the same as my s/o :(
roses are red violets are blue when The Oh Hellos saw you they said "Shoo"
Ur mom so stupid that she thought that Seventeen has four ghost members.
You're so ugly that when The Oh Hellos saw you, they were like "Oh Bye!"
What's the difference between Chris Brown and Santa?
Santa stops at three hoes.
The bands Def Leppard and Blind Melon did a collaboration.
They called the song “Helen Keller.”
How do you get a party started in Africa?
You put a slice of bread on the ceiling and everyone will be jumping.
When Chris Brown heard he wasn’t the only one to hit a woman.
Stop the cap.
I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.
Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."
"Karma is the guy on the Chiefs, Coming straight home to me."
Why is Peter Pan always flying? He Neverlands!
Where do sheep go to get their hair cut? The baa-baa shop.
Why did Adele cross the road? To sing, “Hello from the other side!”
How do trees access the internet? They log in.
Did you get them? Me neither. I mean, it is worst jokes ever. I'm kidding, I actually do understand them.
https://www.youtube.com/@andrewjbsax
How can one make Death Row a little more fun?
Musical electric chairs.
How do you make the world’s greatest Harlem Shake?
Throw a flashbang into a room full of epileptics.
Did you hear about the broken guitar for sale?
It comes with no strings attached.
My friend had one request for me before he committed suicide, and that was to play Van Halen’s “Jump” at his funeral.
Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."
Why do all of Oliver Anthony's songs sound like "shit"?
Answer: Because he sucks!
What is the difference between R Kelly and Kelly Clarkson?
R Kelly hits on preteens, Kelly Clarkson hits on toddlers.
