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Garden

Shitpost master-general · 11 months ago

A diagram illustrating wireless internet signal strength within and around a house. The house layout shows a 'Router' in the center, and rooms labeled 'Bed', 'Desk', and 'Xbox'. A color-coded legend indicates 'Crap' (red), 'Poor' (yellow), and 'Great' (green) signal strength. The 'Bed', 'Desk', and 'Xbox' areas show red (crap) signal. The area immediately around the 'Router' shows yellow (poor) signal. 'The middle of your garden' and 'Out on the street' show green (great) signal. Below the house diagram, 'Your neighbor's house' is depicted entirely in green, indicating great signal strength.

Air fryer

Face mcshooty · 1 year ago

A still from a movie is accompanied by text that reads: "When the Humans vs Technology war happens in the future and you have to kill your air fryer."

Carpet

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A man looking upset is pictured above a comment that reads: "I have your face on a carpet and I like to strip naked and cover myself in honey and roll around on the carpet until I pee (love your bellybutton)." Text over the man reads: "Bro leave this man alone."

Theft

Heroin Monkey · 11 months ago

A top-down shot of a large amount of groceries laid out on a table, including boxes of cereal, packaged meats (chicken and beef), bags of snacks (Cheez-It, chips), canned goods (tuna, crushed tomatoes, green beans), cartons of milk, jugs of water, and other various food items. Above the image, text reads: "@entrapanure here's what $0 gets you at a grocery store if you're not a pussy".

Respect

Anonymous · 5 months ago

A meme using Wojak characters. On the left is a woman with long brown hair, a black choker, and a tank top that says "MOMMY E-THOT"; she looks angry. Text below her says "You need to respect me". On the right is the blonde, bearded 'Chad' Wojak looking calm. Text below him says "You literally sell pictures of your butt hole on the internet for $5 a month. So, no." A watermark for "WESTERN REDEMPTION" with a skull in a cowboy hat is visible in the background.

Friendship

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

Hammer

Willy b · 2 months ago

A meme with text reading 'When you're ashamed of what you've been nailing lately' above an image of a claw hammer standing in a wall corner with its head pressed against the wall, as if standing in time-out or hiding its face in shame.

Discount

Anonymous · 2 years ago

💀😭

A two-panel image. The first panel shows two anime characters embracing under the moonlight. The second panel shows the faces of two characters intimately close, possibly about to kiss. The text reads: "When you go to the restaurant with your mom and there's discount for couples."

Shrek

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

Shrek walks down a hallway with a big smile. The text on the image reads, "When the joke is so funny HR wants to hear it in person."

Girl

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A text message conversation is shown. The first message says, "Yoh bro your girl is cheating on you fool." The reply says, "I'm deaf bro." Another message says, "Sorry my bad." Then there is a sequence of hand sign emojis, and finally, the last message says, "That fucking hoe."

Owl

Swf · 1 year ago

A two-panel image with the text "There's an owl outside your house waiting for you" at the top. The top panel shows a man looking excited, with the text 'Harry Potter fans' on the left. The bottom panel shows a man crying, with the text 'Duolingo users' on the left.

Technology

Thoughtless · 1 year ago

A text post that says: "We live in an age where you can press a button and a deep web hitman shows up at your door and kills you. Technology is incredible." Followed by two comments: "what button", and "what fucking button".

Poop

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The image shows a phone screen with a sad Bart Simpson face on top and the text "Fake Smile". Further down it says "one of those nights", followed by a music player with the song "Hope" by XXXTENTACION playing. The screen also shows a message from "Mom" saying "Clean your poop out the shower NOW!!!! This is the 17th time."

Cookie

Sooploosh MacSchnibble · 1 year ago

The image shows a Twitter thread. Ernie Keebler tweets about getting an email from a Nigerian prince and not being sure how sending 900 Fudge Stripes will help. Jacob replies positively, mentioning the good marketing. Ernie responds positively to Jacob and Jacob then responds to Ernie with "suck my cock ernie keebler".

Sock

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A hand holds a black box of Kleenex tissues with gold and white accents. It reads: "Kleenex FOR MEN. Now with spermicide." An illustration shows a pair of socks with the tagline "Ditch your special sock."

Grinding

Anonymous · 1 year ago

Shitpost-master general

A man in a suit walks towards a private jet, with the text "How it feels when the dentist says you've been grinding in your sleep."

Teacher

Face mcshooty · 1 year ago

Two cartoon fish sit at a table looking miserable. Text reads: "When the teacher says, 'Discuss your ideas with the person sitting next to you,' but you don't fw the person sitting next to you."

Dinner

The Ugly Rat · 3 years ago

When your dad asks what you want for dinner in a group chat…..

A text message bubble saying "FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD."

House

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A stick figure of a child asks his dad, who is sitting at a desk in front of a monitor displaying a Bitcoin chart, "Are you winning Dad?" The dad responds with "No, pack your things, I just lost the house."

Mood

shaylie lol · 2 years ago

Two women, one on the left covering her face and laughing, and one on the right laughing at her phone. Text above the women reads: "that mood when you and your bestie are laughing at the most stupid things for no reason."

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