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Today memes

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Item

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A person's arm with many fresh cuts is shown. A barcode scanner is pointed towards the arm. The text says "*beep* "I'm sorry this item is worthless."

Bed

Anonymous · 3 years ago

Meme for today

A cartoon raccoon named Rigby has a confused facial expression. The text says "IF BEDBUGS LIVE IN BEDS, BUT WHERE COCKROACHES LIVE?"

Basement

stillwaiting.. · 3 years ago

The image shows a man with short brown hair and a mustache, wearing a red hoodie, standing in front of a basement staircase. The text on the image reads: "Today I'm going to buy this basement full of children."

Snitch

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A page from a 'Diary of a Wimpy Kid' style book. The text entry from Monday, December, reads, 'Today was fucking dreadful. Me and the boys were just watching porn on the school computers in computer science. Nothing harmful. You know how it goes, though. There's always some bitch across the room, just waiting, dying to ruin the fun.' Below the text is a cartoon drawing of a computer lab. Three boys are at computers. A girl, Patty, points at one boy (Greg) and shouts, 'GREG IS WATCHING PORNOGRAPHY, MR JIZZLE!' Another boy, Greg's friend, yells, 'WHAT THE FUCK?!' The text continues below the drawing: 'The next time I see Patty, I swear to god, that snitch is fucking dead.'

Doodle

Wilkinsonburritos · 3 years ago

i made a doodle earlier today

A digital drawing of a person looking to the side, with a thought bubble or a frame next to them showing a red Among Us character with a large, dark shadow underneath.

Crackhead

Cahyani Ambara · 3 years ago

Crackheads be like :

A cartoon girl with red hair is introducing a red cartoon character resembling Knuckles from Sonic the Hedgehog. The text on the image says "My guest star for today is my little brother J.J."

Character

Hollow Knight Beater · 3 years ago

Hollow Knight Meme

The image shows a Discord message. The user SkinnyBird asks, "Still think Marajuana isn't bad?" followed by two images of the Hollow Knight character. The first character is labeled "No smoke" and is the normal form of the character. The second, below, is labeled "2 smoke" and shows a dramatically transformed and deteriorated form of the character.

Spine

Jazzy💕 · 2 years ago

A meme shows the text "Me: 'Yes, I am still young.' My spine:" above an image of a man looking down and saying, "I said we old today."

Video Game

sonicjokesmemesandposts · 1 year ago

wow mario got done dirty

The image is a four-panel meme. The top left panel shows an old video game screenshot of Sonic with the text: "When the drowning countdown starts, but Tails takes the air bubble. SCORE 34160 TIME 2:03 RINGS 341 guess I'll die". The top right panel says: "KIDS TODAY GETTING THEIR VIDEO GAME TURNED INTO A MOVIE GET THIS" and shows two images of Sonic: one old and one new movie version. The bottom left panel says: "KIDS IN MY DAY GOT THIS..." and shows an image of a Goomba. The bottom right panel shows an image of the live-action version of King Koopa.

Emotion

✨Jassy✨ · 1 year ago

A young boy is looking at the camera with a slight smile. The text on the image says: "guess who's feeling extra emotionally unstable today"

Life

✨Jassy✨ · 3 years ago

Me every day

A dog with its head on the floor near its food bowl. The text on the image says "I JUST CAN'T HANDLE LIFE TODAY".

Slipper

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A top-down view shows a pair of feet wearing black, white, and red striped slide sandals on a light brown carpet. In the upper left corner of the image, a large brown cockroach is visible on the carpet. A black bar across the center of the image contains the text: My Gucci slippers came in today.

Text message

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A text message conversation. It starts with a message from "fbi agent" saying "You welcome, don't mess this up king". Followed by a question "Wyd", the reply "playing xbox with the boys", then "you?" and finally a message saying: "Parents aren't home come over".

Weed

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a tumblr post showing three separate comments. The first post says "Learned today that my ex-husband buys his weed from a lesbian dominatrix that banned him from DJing at her sex club because he kept playing his version of 'Lean on Me' made entirely of samples of Homer saying 'd'oh'." The second comment says "AMAZING". The third comment says "Every word in that sentence is better than the last".

Fleshlight

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A timeline shows that the most important events in history include the invention of the wheel and fire in the past, and the fleshlight today.

Nothing

Anonymous · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a Discord message that reads, "Nah but why does your appendix do absolutely nothing and then just try to kill you?"

Tire

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A car is missing one tire. A tire is laying on the ground in front of the car. A hand is holding a power tool, likely a grinder, in front of the tire.

Stranger

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A cast iron skillet in a dishwasher with yellow and blue bowls. The text overlay reads: "I want to make some strangers on the internet unreasonably mad today, but first I need to put my cast iron skillet in the dishwasher."

Rapper

projokes · 2 years ago

...

A close-up portrait of a man with a heart tattoo on his face. The text overlay reads: "Rappers today be lookin like a desk in detention".

Slur

Im totally not drunk 2.0 · 2 years ago

They’re talking abt the Mexican slur 💀

A dark-themed chat with the text: "No, ginger. What even is a uhm, thing with bean in it? Is it like a cult?" The chat is from today at 5:39 PM.

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