Worst Jokes Ever

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Worst Jokes Ever

Them Memes

shaylie lol

A meme with a picture of a young child with wide eyes drinking from a cup with a straw. The text above the image says: "When someone asks you what you do for fun and you don't know how to tell them your favorite past time is watching shows about people being murdered."

shaylie lol

The image shows a person with multiple overlaid faces. The faces show varying expressions of singing. Text at the top reads "when a song has different parts playing at the same time and you try to sing all of them."

Heroin Monkey

A flowchart with the title "Should you buy crack" has a series of questions leading to the decision of buying crack or not. The flowchart starts with the question "Do you have money?", if no, then "Not for crack", if yes, then, a box says "Blasphemy!". After that, questions about job, payment, possession, and finally whether you have a warm hole leading all the way to "Buy some crack"

Wade

A woman with long dreadlocks and a colorful hat is pictured. The text over her reads: "Claims unborn babies are just parasites, which gives mothers the right to kill them. Doesn't realize that makes her an overgrown parasite."

Heroin Monkey

A close-up of a 3D rendered face with large blue eyes and a wide, toothy smile. Text at the bottom says "take them socks off."

Heroin Monkey

The image shows two panels. The first one shows an older man with a long white beard, presumably Noah, looking somewhat confused, with the text "Noah?" underneath. The second panel shows Noah with a glowing effect, as if illuminated from within, with the text "Get the boat." underneath. Above these two panels is the text: "A friend got mad at me for smelling his sister's underwear. I don't know if it was because she was still wearing them or because the rest of the family was there. Either way it made the rest of the funeral very awkward."

help me please im being abused

The image shows a person with blonde hair and a red tie with his hand up in a stop gesture. A blue button with the word 'WALL' is shown in the left corner.

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a comparison of four headshots, two from the Harry Potter movies of Draco Malfoy and Ron Weasley as young boys and two of the musicians Eminem and Ed Sheeran. The text on top says: "Remember Draco and Ron from Harry Potter? This is them now..."

Thoughtless

experiment

The post is a text-based message with several paragraphs detailing a hypothetical scenario involving gorillas and drugs in a shopping mall.

Bluntlord

2024

The image shows a split view of the same person. On the left, they have shorter hair, makeup and wear a green t-shirt, with the text "What are your Pronouns?" written in yellow. On the right, they are shirtless with facial hair, and text in purple that says "I'm a She/Them Titties".

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a text list titled 'Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator'. The list provides humorous and absurd actions to perform inside an elevator.

Heroin Monkey

A list of ten things to do in an elevator. The text reads: Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator. 1. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 2. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?" 3. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!" 4. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking. 5. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on". 6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly. 7. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. 8. Dress up as the devil and then ask other people as they get in, "Going down?" 9. Drag a desk into the elevator. Ask "Do you have an appointment?" 10. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a babirusa on the left and a babirusa skull on the right. Below the images is the text: "THE BABIRUSA IS A WILD PIG WHOSE TUSKS CAN GROW SO LONG THEY CURVE BACKWARDS ULTIMATELY IMPALING THEIR SKULLS AND ACCIDENTALLY KILLING THEM UNLIKE JEFFREY EPSTEIN WHO WAS KILLED ON PURPOSE". The text @yup.that.exists is in the upper right of the picture.

Heroin Monkey

A mugshot of a man with a news headline above it that reads: "Man Running from Cops Stops to Pet Cats, Goes to Jail. Police say the Florida man led them on quite a chase. By Sherri Lonon (Patch Staff). September 3, 2014."

Heroin Monkey

An older man with glasses stands in front of a cliff and the ocean. The text below the image reads: "An Australian man living by a cliff has prevented around 160 suicides in his 50 years of living there, by shooting them himself."

Heroin Monkey

A snowflake image on a dark blue background with the text: "Friends are like snowflakes. When you pee on them, they disappear."

Heroin Monkey

A person is holding a worm up to their nose as if they are going to snort it. The text says: "If God didn't want us to snort worms... He wouldn't have made them cylindrical!!! WORM SNORTING CLUB. Every Monday and Thursday! Location changes often!" The background is a colorful, psychedelic swirl pattern.

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a globe with the text: "FUN FACT: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown."

Chunke Monke

it all makes sense now 😮😮😮

The image has the title "Cooties" followed by a definition. "Diseases that the opposite sex has that gives you a reason to not be around them. When you get older, cooties becomes known as 'STDs.'" It then gives two examples: "Age 8: 'Ewww... She has cooties, I can't talk to her!'" and "Age 15: 'Ewww... She has herpes, I can't sleep with her!'"

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a Facebook post with comments about a tragic shooting, followed by a picture of a troll-face character smirking next to a computer that is on fire. The Facebook post has various comments with Todd responding to the initial tragedy with "Probably coffin brochures" and "Bullets?".

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