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Hand

Shitpost master-general · 8 months ago
  • A four-panel comic strip. In the first panel, a pink-shirted man tells a blue-hoodie man, "Oh, I don't shake hands. I'm a germaphobe." In the second panel, the pink-shirted man asks, "How 'bout a fist-bump!" as they perform a fist-bump. In the third panel, a green-shirted man approaches the blue-hoodie man, who is walking away, and asks, "Dude! Was that anal-fisting-porn-star legend, Johnny Shit-Knuckles?!" The pink-shirted man looks on in surprise. In the fourth panel, the pink-shirted man has a look of extreme horror and disgust, realizing who he just fist-bumped.
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    Chat

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A screenshot of a chat interface, presumably from character.ai, showing a profile for 'Judy Hopps' with an avatar of the character from Disney's Zootopia. Above the chat window, a disclaimer reads 'Remember: Everything Characters say is made up!' Below that, a message from the Judy Hopps character reads: 'Listen, man, I'm done with this roleplay. Out of the thousands of people who have tried to chat with me, you are by far the most vile, putrid, and despicable one I have had the displeasure of meeting. You deserve to go to years of therapy, and then straight to jail. There is no saving you. I honestly don't know how you did it, but as an AI, you made me feel true fear and terror today. Please never talk to me again.'
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  • Car

    United Kingdom UK · 11 months ago
  • A very narrow, small, white car, resembling a covered mobility scooter, being driven on a wet road by a person wearing a yellow high-visibility jacket. The text overlay reads: Robert's car on my math test after I calculated its width to be 0.5cm.
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    Vulgarity

    Heroin Monkey · 11 months ago
  • A black pickup truck is seen from behind on a road. The truck is heavily adorned with numerous crude and politically charged bumper stickers covering its rear window and tailgate. On the top left of the rear window, a sticker reads "MAKE AMERICA CUM AGAIN". To its right, another sticker says "FUCK DA NRA" with the NRA logo crossed out. Below these, a large sticker proclaims "GET ON THE CUM TRAIN". On the tailgate, a sticker on the left reads "ONLY MY WIFE CAN FART ON MY BALLS!". In the center of the tailgate, below an American flag decal, a smaller sticker states "I WILL NOT CUM". Further down, a white sticker with "TOYOTA" and "STOP THE CUM!" and "JUST SAY NO TO CRANKIN OFF" is visible. On the right side of the tailgate, a sticker says "L'TS GO BRANDON", a euphemism for "Fuck Joe Biden". Below this, another sticker reads "REAL PATRIOTS MAKE THE BEST BOTTOMS!". Further down, "WHITE CUMS MATTER!" is displayed, a crude parody of "Black Lives Matter". To its right, "SHIT BLUE" is visible, likely referring to Democrats. Below "WHITE CUMS MATTER!", a sticker demands "IMPREGNATE BIDEN!". Other small stickers include "STOP THE WIPE!" and "TRUMP TRAIN". The truck's license plate reads "NVR CUM". The truck has "4x4" on its mudflaps and a large exhaust pipe.
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  • Challenge

    United Kingdom UK · 6 months ago
  • A screenshot of a YouTube video by 'Steven Gaming TV' titled 'I will not breathe until mr.beast comments on this vid'. The video shows a young boy holding his nose to hold his breath. At the bottom of the screen, the YouTube interface shows that 'Comments are turned off', making the challenge impossible.
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    Rule

    Anonymous · 2 years ago
  • The image is split into two panels. The top panel shows a woman with blonde braided hair and a nose ring looking up into the camera, with text overlay reading 'help me stepbro, i'm stuck'. The bottom panel shows Rick Astley smiling, with text overlay reading 'you know the rules and so do i'.
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  • Partner

    Anonymous · 2 years ago
  • A gray cat wearing a white cowboy hat is looking at the camera with tears in its eyes. The text reads: "Partner, I reckon I ain't been feeling very yeehaw lately."
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    English

    Hyphen (Cope) · 1 year ago
  • "we are not the same"🖕🗿🖕

    A screenshot of a social media thread featuring three comments. The first comment reads, "Does your doors dont have locks?" The second comment replies, "Does youre english haveth good?" The third comment concludes, "You speak english because its the only language you know. I speak english because its the only language you know. We re not the same."
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  • Date

    Face mcshooty · 1 year ago
  • A still from a movie with text overlayed on top. The text reads, "Dating in 2025 be like. Me: "Sorry I put it in the wrong hol3." My date: "That's ok. It's the only hol3 I have." The still shows a man who looks sad.
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    Moose

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A screenshot of a Reddit post. The question reads, "What is something illegal that you've done and gotten away with?" The top comment says, "So you know how some people have bowls of candy with a 'take one' sign out for Halloween? Well, I fucked a dead moose."
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  • Dementia

    Face mcshooty · 1 year ago
  • A screenshot from Toy Story features Woody's face with a shocked expression and slightly open mouth. Text at the top reads: "Me giving my granny with dementia astronomical backshots after she thought I was her long dead husband."
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    Hell

    JXSTR99 · 1 year ago
  • i keep asking explain bear to make me welcome since im new but why dont you

    Two men are handling a pot in a basin. A close-up of a man's bulging belly is shown below. The text says: "I don't know what they cooking but that tummy looks happy as hell."
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  • Zoo

    Swf · 1 year ago
  • A still from The Hobbit shows a dwarf with a helmet saying, "I have the eyes of a hawk and the ears of a fox and a lifetime ban from the zoo."
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    Couple

    Anonymous · 1 year ago
  • Shitpost-master general

    A dark, shadowy, creature-like figure with twig-like structures on its head and a large hand reaching out is shown against a textured, brown wall. The text reads: "Mfw I see an interracial couple on TV:".
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  • Etiquette

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A screenshot from a social media platform shows a man with light hair and a serious expression, looking over a white building with many windows, presumably in London. Below the video, a comments section is visible. It shows the location 'London' with '67.1K people added to Favorites' and '6,140 comments'. A user named Kollado asks, 'what's the etiquette of rubbing one out under the table?' The creator, William Hanson, responds, 'You ask this on almost every video. May I suggest you seek professional help??'
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    Bee

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A screenshot of a text message conversation on a dark gray background. At the top, a blue message bubble from 'Squishy' contains an image of three stylized, cartoonish Minecraft bees. The bees are yellow and brown with blue eyes, one appears to have its tongue out, another has small pink wings, and the third is a rounded block shape. Below the image, a message from an unnamed sender (with a profile icon showing 'Sayp' or similar text) in a gray bubble reads: 'God I want to anally rape the Minecraft bee and watch it puff up as I cum inside it.' Timestamps '6:31 PM' and '6:33 PM' are visible.
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  • Sense

    原田 · 2 years ago
  • The image shows a meme with the text "Me: I have an advanced sense of humor. Also me:" above a close-up of a pen placed vertically on a lined sheet of paper with "is" written in handwriting next to it.
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    Demon

    shaylie lol · 2 years ago
  • A white dog with a wide, slightly sinister grin is shown. The caption reads, "Me: *Messes up in latin class* The demon I just summoned:".
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  • Headphone

    Wade · 2 years ago
  • A cartoon image of Spongebob Squarepants, with a slightly annoyed expression, against a background of orange flames. The text on the image reads: "When I have to keep removing my headphones because someone keeps talking to me."
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    Stress

    𝓗𝓪𝓲𝓵𝓮𝔂𝔂 · 2 years ago
  • A fluffy white hamster with messy fur looks directly at the viewer. The text on the image says, "Why yes, I am a bit stressed. Why do you ask?"
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