Worst Jokes Ever

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RealBoat

Elvis with his future wife, Priscilla, who was 14 at
the time they met
BEST COMMENTS
MajesticFxxkingEagle • 1h
"Say Elvis...I heard you like 'em young"
Kloackster 45m
whop whop whop whop
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GlamdringBeater. 29m
"Tryna strike a chord, and it's prolly A-Minor"
This seriously might be the single best lyric ever
written.
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Anonymous

Right, the bit as the bottom... i mean, look i keep myslef open on systems to rule empires and shit should i ever need to be it.

A drawing of a hydra with multiple heads. The text on the image reads: "Hydra System. The Hydra is simple, every 2 represents a 1. When a head is cut, its twin must lead the next 2 novice heads. This means when every weak point is exercised the weak spot is a new offense. The perfect system."

Nintendo Fan

A kitchen with a counter top, a stove, cooking pots, cups, and a knife rack with many knives. The text on the image reads: "The secret to a clean kitchen is simple. Don't cook, ever."

Nintendo Fan

A photo of a group of people in an art gallery, facing a blank white wall with their shadows projected on it. Above the image is text saying 'If you ever feel useless' and below it says 'these people paid money to look at 'Invisible' art'.

Heroin Monkey

The image is a four panel comic. In the first panel, an ant is shown happily eating a crumb, thinking "Man, these are the best crumbs I've ever had!!" In the second panel, a man looks shocked, exclaiming "Ayoo dude no wayy!!" In the third panel, the man is holding up a sock with white fluid on it, saying, "I thought I lost this cum sock ages ago!!" The fourth panel shows a close-up of the ant, now with a disgusted expression.

Sooploosh MacSchnibble

A tweet from Joe Heenan stating he wrote a script during lockdown and received an email from someone at Netflix. The email reads, Dear Mr. Heenan, Thank you for the script, it's one of the best we have ever read. The writing is superb, it's tense, funny & non stop action. The only problem is it's the script to Die Hard. You literally sent us the script to Die Hard & changed the title to Mr. No Shoes and the Shooty Shooty Bang Bang Christmas. Never contact us again.

Sooploosh MacSchnibble

A four-panel cartoon shows a father talking to his son in the first panel, saying "...and under no circumstance should you ever hit a woman." The second panel shows the son, now an adult, sitting on a bed with a woman in front of him on all fours and saying "Spank me, Kenny." The third panel shows Kenny saying "No." The fourth panel shows the father behind Kenny saying "I'm proud of you, son."

Anonymous

In a still from a movie, Captain America is strangling a robot. Text reads: "If you ever feel dumb, just remember that Captain America tried to choke a robot."

Anonymous

The only acceptable homosexual ever (Tchaikovsky):

A black and white portrait of Tchaikovsky with the text: "The only acceptable homosexual ever (Tchaikovsky)."

Anonymous

best last comment ever

A screenshot of a comment that says: "Amy's gonna masturbate to a video of may masturbating."

Anonymous

Two Roblox avatars are standing on a colorful platform. A text bubble above them reads: "lol have you ever rubbed your kitty in circles?"

rapboat

Two pictures of infomercial salesmen. The first is a man with a yellow cloth smiling. The second is a man with a box of baking soda pointing. The text of the meme talks about how one man's dislike of another was like the hate between two rappers.

Your local comrade

The talk

A comic strip with three panels. In the first panel, a pink figure asks a taller blue figure, "Dad! Am I adopted?" In the second panel, the blue figure replies, "Of course not!" In the third panel, the blue figure says, "Why would I ever choose you?"

Heroin Monkey

A turkey with crab legs and string sausage on a baking tray. The text reads: "A turkey, some crab legs and some string sausage and nobody will ever ask you to make a holiday dinner again."

Anonymous

A photo shows a man in a black coat crouching in front of a tombstone with the text '*The First ever Joke*' on it. There are other people in the background. The text below the tombstone says 'WHAT IT FELT LIKE VISITING THE FIRST EVER JOKE OF WJE'. The man is smiling and holding up a peace sign.

Heroin Monkey

The image shows text that reads: "yall ever just take a cold shower in the dark on all fours and groan pleasurably pretending you're a wet rhino on the african savannah during the first rain in years."

Flappy.

A tabby cat looks at the viewer with a serious expression. Text overlay reads: "if you ever feel safe just remember i'm out there".

rapboat

Imagine disliking RAP, the greatest genre of music this world has ever seen

A view from the driver's seat of a car traveling on a highway during sunset.

shaylie lol

A person with messy hair is lying in bed looking confused. The text on the image says: You ever take a nap so good that you thought you missed the school bus. But it's Sunday...and you're 32.

shaylie lol

A close-up of a green buttock with two bones sticking out of it. The text on top reads, "You ever sit for so long that your butt feels like this."

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