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Survival

36 views · Shitpost master-general · 5 months ago

A vintage-style instructional poster depicts a serious-looking man in a suit extending his hand in a 'stop' gesture towards a choker with a bell. To his left, a list of items includes a maid dress, cat ears, and thigh-high stockings, each with a green checkmark and approval text: 'Sure', 'Definitely', 'Yea'. The choker with a bell has a red 'X' and the text 'NO'. The top banner reads: 'KNOW WHERE TO DRAW THE LINE! Always keep in mind that some articles, while cute, may impair your ability to sneak and catch small birds and rodents, essential to your survival.'

Student

58 views · Shitpost master-general · 5 months ago

A news article headline states 'Student CRUCIFIES a rat on a wooden cross before burning it after catching the rodent 'eating his pet turtle''. Below the headline are two images. The left image shows a rat, appearing to be dead, tied to a small wooden cross made of two branches, which is propped up against a tree trunk in a grassy area. The rat's limbs are outstretched as if crucified. The right image is a close-up of the rat on the cross, showing its face and body more clearly, with wires or string wrapped around its limbs to the cross. The rat's mouth is open slightly.

Pokemon

59 views · Willy b · 6 months ago

A school bulletin board, yellow, adorned with cutout images of Pokémon characters like Ash Ketchum, Pikachu, Charmander, and Bulbasaur, along with Poké Balls. Large, colorful letters in the center spell out "DON'T CATCH 'EM AT ALL". Surrounding this text are several informational sheets about sexually transmitted infections, with visible titles including "Gonorrhea", "Chlamydia", "Syphilis", and "Hepatitis C".

Classic

19 views · Heroin Monkey · 8 months ago

A screenshot of a Google search results page. The search bar at the top displays the query 'american literature classics'. Below, sponsored results are shown. The first result is a book cover titled 'THE SIGMA MALE BIBLE' by John Russel, featuring a white wolf. Below the title, the tagline reads 'Unleash The Lone Wolf And Master The Sigma Grindset To Achieve Success'. The second result is a book cover titled 'WHEN THE Side N***** CATCH FEELINGS' by National Bestselling Author Jessica N. Watkins, depicting a dark-skinned man with a beard looking away from a woman peering over his shoulder. A third partially visible book cover on the far right is titled 'THE SOUTH WAS RIGHT!'

Police

32 views · The Abyss · 9 months ago

Respectable

A close-up photo shows a person holding a pigeon. A small, light blue fabric backpack is strapped to the pigeon's back, and through an opening in the fabric, numerous small, white pills are visible inside. The text at the top reads, "Police catch a pigeon with 200 ecstasy pills hidden in a little backpack."

STD

30 views · Heroin Monkey · 11 months ago

A photo of a bulletin board featuring Pokemon characters surrounding the phrase "Don't catch 'em at all," with the names of various STDs listed below.

Porn

31 views · Face mcshooty · 1 year ago

ethan fr

A meme showing two characters from Teen Titans with text that says, "ME CATCHING THE MF WHO KEEPS WATCHING FURRY PORN ON MY PC."

Schedule

6 views · DAP ME UP · 1 year ago

Rate my daily schedule

The image shows a daily schedule. It lists activities from waking up at 6 AM to going to sleep at 3 or 4 AM, including school, meals, chores, and walking the dog. It also mentions snacks, specifically "3 grilled cheeses on hamburger buns."

Blowjob

185 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

The text says "Schrödinger's blowjob?" followed by a description of a hypothetical scenario. It states that while blindfolded one receives the best blowjob ever. The identity of the person is not known and it could be anyone such as Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold or even the fireman's cat. The question asked is if you would take off the blindfold to find out, or just leave it on.

Ball

2 views · Anonymous · 1 year ago

What a catch

A man, Donald Trump, with a wound on his face holds up a baseball glove with a ball in it. Another man with sunglasses stands behind him. The American flag is in the background.

Sister

10 views · Ogga🤫🧏‍♀️ · 1 year ago

بخق قثم (Arabic)

A meme featuring a woman looking perplexed, surrounded by complex mathematical equations, with the text "Me trying to find out why my sister is being nice to me."

Father

16 views · MEME LORD · 1 year ago

A picture of a chimpanzee with an open mouth and a dark background. The text above the image says: "When I finally become flexible enough to bend down and give myself top for the first time, but my dad catches me and helps me out instead."

Attack

9 views · Wade · 2 years ago

Bro really said “eat shit”

A comic book panel shows Sonic and Knuckles confronting an enemy. Sonic tells Knuckles to secure the Master Emerald to prevent the enemy from using its power. Knuckles questions if Sonic is crazy. The panel shows the enemy attacking, with a sound effect 'SHKOOM'

Sonic

13 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A text message conversation shows the question "What's wrong?" with the answer "Whenever Sonic beats Eggman in the final level, Eggman always outruns him and gets to his giant robot before Sonic catches him, beating Sonic's average running speed of 767.269 miles per hour which is the speed of sound. This means that Dr Eggman is actually the fastest thing alive." followed by the reply "nothing". The message is shown on a white background with a phone keyboard shown at the bottom.

Meme

17 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a cartoon penguin wearing sunglasses and holding a fishing rod with the text "I hope I catch a good meme." Below the penguin is a cartoon image of Sayori from Doki Doki Literature Club, hanging from the fishing line.

Monster

20 views · Cutepink · 2 years ago

Paranormal monsters be like:

The image shows a tall, dark figure with pale face and long, claw-like hands standing in a doorway. The text overlay reads "THE MOMENT YOU CATCH HIM SNEAKING MIDNIGHT" and "OOPS DIDN'T NOTICE YOU WOKE UP."

Meme

8 views · TechPriestGotDrip · 3 years ago

A cartoon penguin wearing a hat and sunglasses and holding a fishing rod is shown in the image. There's text on the penguin that says: "I hope I catch a good meme".

Patience

12 views · GG Miller · 3 years ago

tryna catch a body??

The image shows a yellow minion holding a red bat. Above the minion are the words: "PATIENCE IS WHAT YOU HAVE WHEN THERE ARE TOO MANY WITNESSES."

Angel

32 views · Frog · 3 years ago

Haha

The image is split into two panels. On the left, the text says "God", and below that is a picture of a man with a tense expression. On the right, the text says "Dinos", and below that is a picture of a cat looking sad and distressed. Above these two panels, the text says "angel: Hey God, catch! *throws meteor* God: *drops the meteor*"

Checkout

7 views · Dawson Maxey · 3 years ago

LOLOL

A photo of a doll with light brown hair, blue eyes, a wide nose and a slightly unsettling smile. The text reads "When you catch a glimpse of yourself in the self checkout camera."

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