Worst Jokes Ever

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Worst Jokes Ever

Action Memes

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a Twitter thread by user 'ka vinki' (@jkavinsky). The first tweet says 'getting hit by a car kinda fun fr it feels like an action movie when u roll over the hood'. The second tweet is a reply to the first, stating 'driver was crying like she killed me or something relax'. The third tweet is another reply, saying 'nurse asked me to rate the pain 1 to 10 n i said 25 n started screaming i'm getting this morphine one way or another'.

Adolf Nigler

People will bet on everything... ...I mean nothing.

A screenshot of a prediction market titled "Nothing Ever Happens: May." The market rules state that it will resolve to "No" if Russia and Ukraine agree to a ceasefire, the next Pope is Black, the Fed cuts rates, India invades Pakistan, or Israel or the US take military action against Iran. Otherwise, it will resolve to "Yes."

offensivegifsguy

An animated man wearing a headset with a determined but strained expression. The text "Lock in!" is superimposed on the image.

Heroin Monkey

A child sits in a high chair covered in spaghetti and sauce with a green food tray in front of him. The text overlay reads, "He threw a piece of bread at me so I flipped his lil dumbass over. Fuck them kids."

Heroin Monkey

The photo shows the inside of a bus with blue and gray seats and yellow handrails. Superimposed on the image is the quote: "Fart once, they will forget it in a couple days. Shit yourself, and they'll remember for years. Make big moves to be remembered."

MATTIX

The image shows a side-by-side comparison of two cars with text above and below each image. The image on the left shows a red classic car with the text "Cars in action movies" above it and the text "Still works after being shot 1000 times" below it. The image on the right shows a small black car with the text "Cars in horror movies" above it and the text "Can't even start" below it.

Adolf kitler

A white cat with human-like facial features, with the text "Nobody: Live action cats movie:" above it.

Adolf Nigler

When you run out of ammo in COD and decide to handle it yourself:

A man in a suit is holding a gun and aiming it towards his laptop. He's on a white table against a white background.

Why should you care

MWAHAHAHAHA

The image is a two-panel meme. On the left, a person in athletic wear is kicking their leg up as if doing a dance. Text above reads, "You better not come in here with that nonsense'. Me coming in with that nonsense:". On the right, there is an image of snowy stairs. Text above reads, "Take life one step at a time'. The steps:".

Heroin Monkey

A man is squatting and seemingly peeing into a bucket where two other men are sitting.

Anonymous

POV its late at night and your wife lickes her lips

A close-up image of a dog's face with its mouth open, teeth showing, and one eye squinting. The dog is looking to the side, and its expression appears mischievous.

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a stick figure with its arm in different positions. The text labels the different arm positions: 'CALL WAITER', 'CALL TAXI', 'PET CHILDREN', 'PET DOG', and 'REST'. Additionally, there's a text that reads: "Auf der Heide blüht ein kleines Blümelein Und das heißt: Erika!".

Seb

See you, SaH.

A still from the movie "The Terminator" showing the Terminator (played by Arnold Schwarzenegger) with sunglasses, looking back with the text "I'LL BE BACK" overlaid.

Heroin Monkey

A man with dark skin and sunglasses, a gun in his hand, has been photoshopped over a movie poster and given the name "The Lubricator". The man also has a red dot over one eye, like a robot.

Heroin Monkey

A person is standing in front of a bulletin board with the title "Meet the person responsible for your" followed by the words "choices, grades, success, parents, divorce, actions" each in a separate colored frame.

Heroin Monkey

A sad looking Mario is sitting on a gray staircase. On top of the image, there is a list of situations, such as "When there's no strike in the counter," "when there's no battle on the front," "When the Ark doesn't survive," "When the mine doesn't craft," "When the titans aren't falling," "When the cause isn't just," "when the duty doesn't call," and "When the residents aren't evil."

Sooploosh MacSchnibble

A tweet from Joe Heenan stating he wrote a script during lockdown and received an email from someone at Netflix. The email reads, Dear Mr. Heenan, Thank you for the script, it's one of the best we have ever read. The writing is superb, it's tense, funny & non stop action. The only problem is it's the script to Die Hard. You literally sent us the script to Die Hard & changed the title to Mr. No Shoes and the Shooty Shooty Bang Bang Christmas. Never contact us again.

Heroin Monkey

The image is a flow chart titled "Marvel Viewing Order." It includes a mix of Marvel movies and other films, shows, and people, including Captain America, Captain Marvel, Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk, Thor, Iron Man 2, Avengers, Iron Man 3, Chicken Run, Age of Empires IV, How I Met Your Mother, Boss Baby, Looney Tunes Back in Action, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, The Disappearance of Madeleine McCann, Scooby-Doo 2 Monsters Unleashed, The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl, Summer Heights High, Lego Indiana Jones 2 The Adventure Continues, The Cat in the Hat, Ted Cruz, and Avengers Endgame.

Adolf Nigler

nO WaY

A screenshot of a Google search result snippet for a news article. The headline states, "Merrill Lynch agrees to pay nearly $20 million to settle class action racial discrimination lawsuit." Additional text in the snippet confirms this, noting that Merrill Lynch has agreed to the settlement in a lawsuit accusing the Wall Street brokerage of racial discrimination. The snippet indicates the information is from El Paso Inc. and was posted three days ago.

Jazzy💕

A dog with drawn-on eyebrows smirks next to the text: "When someone says "hey you can't do that" and you're like "ok" but you know you're still gonna do it."

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