Marsupial jokes
Why aren't koalas actual bears?
Because they don't meet the koalafications.
Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications.
Why was the Koala Bear so clever?
Because he had good koalifications!
Q: What did one koala say to the other? A: How's it hanging? 😂
What did the kangaroo 🦘 bring to the cookout?
A jump rope!
What do you call a baby kangaroo? Joey.
What do you call a 6 year old named Joey? Supper.
Why did the manager hire the marsupial?
Because he was koala-fied!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
Why didn't the koala make the football team? Because it got diskoalafied!
What type of shirt do kangaroos wear? Jumpsuits.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
A panda goes to see a hooker. He goes down on her, he mates with her, he ejaculates and then he attempts to walk away.
The working girl asks, "Aren't you going to pay me?"
She opens the dictionary to "Prostitute: One who sells sexual companionship for money."
The panda picks up the dictionary and turns to the definition "Panda: A marsupial who eats, roots, shoots, and leaves."
Why are koalas so cool? Because LL Cool J ama said "knock you out!"
Kid: Why aren’t koalas considered bears?
Nerd: Because they're marsupials.
Kid: No, because they didn’t have the koala-fication!
"Koalafications" are irr-elephant.
Koalas ʕ •ᴥ• ʔ are booooooooooooooooo👎
Five little monkeys jumping on the bed,
One fell off and bumped his head.
The momma called the doctor and the doctor said...
“We’re calling Child Protective Services.”
A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks, "Do you have any problems with shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit says, "No." So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.
In school, we learned that squirrels stick their nuts in trees. So, just like my uncle Dave...
A baby skunk's mother gets hit by a car, so the baby skunk doesn't know what he is.
So the baby skunk walks up to a baby bunny and asks, "What are you?" The baby bunny replies, "Well, I'm a baby bunny. What are you?" The baby skunk says, "Well, I don't know, am I a baby bunny too?"
The baby bunny says, "No, you're not a baby bunny." So the baby skunk asks, "Well, what am I then?"
The baby bunny replies, "Well, you're not exactly blank and you're not exactly white, so you must be Mexican."