HI jokes

A kindergarten class is learning about the alphabet. The teacher asked, "What comes after M?"

Little Timmy reached into his backpack and yelled, "16!"

What did Jesus say when they removed the nails from his hands?

"Feet! Feet!"

The cannibal got angry, so he threw up his arms.

Wife: I’m pregnant.

Husband: Hi pregnant, I’m dad.

Wife: No, you’re not.

How did Jesus become self-sovereign?

He screws himself and becomes his own creator.

What goes hahaha bonk?

A man laughing his head off.

What did the orphan say to his dad last?

Please get non-fat milk!

If an orphan wants food, who does it? No one. Everybody just watches him starve because they couldn't find his parents.

HAIKU JOKE:

Helen Keller could Fuck a blind man so hard that she Ends up with his child.

What does a Trump supporter use to load his/her AR-15?

A MAGAzine.

I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home.

So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

Little Johnny walked into his parents' room to see them going at it.

He asked his mom what they were doing, and she said, "Uh, we're play fighting," and he's like, "With no clothes on?"

She said, "Yeah," and so he said, "Let me join you then..."

What did the snail say to his ex-wife?

"I'm still leaving you!"

What is a geographical discovery? Little Johnny found his geography homework undone.

I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it... Oh, wait.

I saw a little boy playing alone in the street. I told him that was a bad idea, then asked for his parents.

God, orphanages are fun to work at!!

What do you say to a person who got his whole left side cut off? "Are you all right?!"

He's got a massive f*cking cock, Ayew, Ayew. He tucks it in his football sock, Ayew, Ayew. Shagged a bird and now she's dead, Swung his cock around her head, Jordan Ayew Palace number nine.

A kid had school today.

He was late every single day. He said in his mind, "I wish I can go to school again." What happened? It's obvious...... He died :)