What do you do when you're sad?
Nothing, because you are just crying about something happening to you.
Me: *gets down on one knee*
Girlfriend: OMG, it's finally happening!
Me: *falls over*
Girlfriend: The poison is kicking in.
What happened when the corn got scolded? He got an earful!
did you hear what happen to the italian chef?
he pasta-way...
Mom, what happens if you swear at a church?
Well, honey, a tee posing nun with glowing red eyes and nunchucks will beat you.
What happens when you fail to be an emo? You don't make the cut.
I was at work and then a little kid came up to me and she said, "What happened to all the parents?" She sounded so confused, so I told her, "It's only yours, kid, they left you on purpose." She cried. I felt bad for a second and thought, oh well, time to get back to my job at the orphanage.
My buddy and I both wanted to marry a woman who happened to be an amputee.
Sadly, my buddy won her heart, but I got her leg.
What happened after Technoblade died?
Everyone got raw pork chop.
One day, Billy's teacher asked him, "I heard your mom had a baby. What did she have?"
Billy paused and thought for a moment and said, "I think she had a bicycle."
"Now Billy, you know that your mom didn't have a bicycle. What did she have?"
"Maybe it was a tricycle."
"Billy, don't stand there and lie to me. We're going to the principal's office right now!"
The teacher grabbed Billy and escorted him to the principal's office and explained what happened. The principal looked sternly at Billy and said, "Stop lying, Billy. You know your mom didn't have a bicycle or a tricycle. What did your mother have?"
Billy looked up, fear in his eyes and said, "Well, maybe she had a go-cart."
That was more than enough. "I'm calling your mother right now!"
Soon, Billy's mother arrived at the principal's office. "It seems that Billy has decided to start telling lies. His teacher asked him what you recently had, and he said a bicycle, then a tricycle, then a go-cart!"
Billy's mother teared up, and through her sobs, replied to the principal and teacher, "No. Sadly, I had a miscarriage."
Billy sat up straight and said, "I KNEW that damn thing had wheels!"
Is it necrophilia if they die while you're having sex and you just don't realize?
That's what happened to my dog.
Don't tell me I haven't got balls. I just happen to wear mine on my chest, and I can guarantee they're a lot bigger than yours!
You know, the strangest things happen. My mom said, "Step on a crack, you break your mama's back, but if you step on a line, you break your father's spine." I stepped on the line. It didn't break his spine. Mom, who is my father?
"What happened to your arm?" "Oh, uh... I became a gacha emo."
What happens to Freedom Towers if they got hit? They stepped in Ground Zero.
technoblade: i'm the second worst thing to ever happen to those orphans. quackity: what is the first thing to ever happen to the orphans??? technoblade: quackity..... their orphans. (disclaimer: not funny xD)
What happened when the emo kid gave the tree a high five it left him hanging
What happens when you work in the Twin Towers? It connects to airplane WiFi.
What happens to the crow in the earthquake?
It turned into a milkshake. 🤔😂
Roses are red violets are blue gum makes me
beautiful but what happened to you?
