Gallows Humor jokes
I wanna be a Christmas decoration cause they always do be hanging.
Q. What's the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid? A. One has a functioning neck.
I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.
How do you get an emo out of a tree?
Just cut the rope.
What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree?
One dead baby nailed to ten trees.
What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is ten kids in one container; morbid humor is one kid in ten containers.
Why did the emo break up with her boyfriend?
He didn't wanna hang out.
What did the tree say to the emo kid? Wanna hang?
What did the tree say to the kid with the rope?
Nothing, he was hanging.
What's the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor: 10 babies in one trash can.
Morbid humor: 1 baby in 10 trash cans.
What do you call an orphan with parents?
Idk, I never met one before.
Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I don’t have any." I said, "Wonder why."
Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.
More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?
An orphan.
Last bonus: Why don’t orphanages teach kids about home?
Because they can’t find one.
lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!
If an emo and a leaf are in a tree, which one will fall first?
Answer: The leaf. The rope saved the emo.
What's an emo's favorite type of necklace? The kind that attaches to a ceiling beam.
What falls from the tree first, the autistic retard or the apple?
The apple, because the rope caught the autistic retard.
What's the best way to get an emo out of a tree?
Cut the rope.
Q. What's an emo's favorite type of comedy?
A. Gallows humor.
I'm going to hang myself in the bathroom at school and put a note telling kids that I'm a piñata.
When I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, they got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
Person A: C'mon person B, just be happy, smile.
Person B: Over my dead body.
Person B: *gets the noose*
I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don't understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what's so sad?" and she said "What do you think was running through these kid's heads before they died?" I replied "probably a bullet". She gasped and said "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent's heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."
Three dead bodies are delivered to the mortuary one day. Each of them has a great big smile on their face.
The coroner examines the bodies and then calls the police to tell them what has happened.
"First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure while making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector," says the coroner.
"Second body: Scotsman, 25, won a thousand pounds on the lottery, spent it all on whisky. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile."
The inspector then asks, "What about the third body?"
"Ah," says the coroner, "This is the most unusual one. Billy-Bob the redneck from Oklahoma, 30, struck by lightning."
"Why is he smiling then?" asks the inspector.
"He thought he was having his picture taken."