Fucked Up jokes
I hate women. You're all walking vaginas who never know when to shut the fuck up.
What did the blender say to the orange juice?
"What the fuck are you, you are so fucking stupid, shut the fuck up."
Shut the fuck up, you fat bitch. You always like to roast others, but you can't walk up the stairs without passing out, you fat, stupid bitch. And I caught you breaking into someone's house just to steal a piece of candy, fat-ass bitch.
It's fucked up how people make these jokes, and when orphans read them, it makes them feel worse about themselves. I should know, I'm an orphan.
Which country makes me crack the fuck up?
LAUGHghanistan.
My birthday's on September 11th, I'm gonna turn the fuck up and throw a banger! Then rub my tits in birthday cake frosting!!! WOOOOOOOOO!
You're do annoying like your fucked up hairline.
Why did I beat up the orphan? Because he was a whiny bitch who wouldn't shut the fuck up.
Please, this is disgusting. This is only men who think that it’s fun to do jokes about rape. It’s really fucking dramatic for a man/woman to get raped, so please just shut the fuck up!
A guy is bankrupt, so he gives his son a duck and tells him to go sell it for as much as he can. So the kid goes on the street to sell the duck. A prostitute walks by and says, "I'll fuck you for $10." The boy says, “I would, but I don't have any money.” She says, “Ok, I'll take the duck instead.” He says ok, so they go upstairs and fuck.
The prostitute says, “That’s the best sex I've ever had. I'll give you the duck back and we can do it again.” So they do and he gets the duck back. But when they go downstairs, the duck gets hit by a car. And the guy that hit the duck feels so bad that he gives the kid $25. So when he gets home, his father asks him why he looks so tired. The boy says, well, I got a fuck for a duck, a duck for a fuck, and $25 for a fucked up fuck.
(Me) Hey bro, tell me a joke!
(My friend) Your mom. *Starts Laughing*
(Me) *Fakes laughs* *then points a gun at him*
At this moment, he knew he fucked up.
Whoever invented religions, they fucked up.
We got all kinds of retarded adults believing in mythologies.
He died because of a fuck up by the Hospital. Apparently, the doctor said to the nurse, "You can discharge Mr. Hawking now," so she went to his room and pulled the plug out of his computer.
What do you call a fucked up mullet? A fullet.
Yo, barber fucked up so bad he pulled out a "Plants vs. Zombies" map and that shii fit perfectly.
(This is a fucked up pick up line). Are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11.
Why can't women just shut the fuck up! I hate women. They need to know their place and stay in the kitchen and be baby makers...
Wait, this is the category "dick." Sorry yours isn't long for yo mama to get fucked up.
If you feel a lump in your rice, you fucked up.
If you feel a lump in your skin, you have cancer.
Have you ever heard of horchata? Horchata, fuck up!