Newest Friend Jokes - Page 15

asking for a friend, could anyone please tell me how to politely ask a question for a friend?

my suicidal friend said he liked trains, so we took him to the tracks

My friend told me my wrist wasn't a cutting board. So I asked her if hers was at all and If i could borrow it.

My friend went to buy so milk, why is she not back yet?

I have a short TRUE story of how i found out my brother was gay and did "it" with his best friend. when my brother was 12-13 years, he fucked his best friend and i saw it. i was like 4-5 years UNDERSTANDING what "it" stood for at the time. all i heard was "ahh" and "mmm". the only thing that traumatized me the most was when my brother moaned "daddy". i was so traumatized that i told my mother about it, she rolled her eyes and said, "he's probably playing a game with Evan". BULLSHIT.. NO YOU DUMBASS. he was playing the game "SEX". more like "GAY SEX". I even told my father and he said, "I don't understand what you're trying to say". I told him DIRECTLY that i heard my brother say "daddy" to his damn best friend! i actually got so curious, i opened the door and saw then doing "69". i was blank white after i saw it. i will NEVER forget that he did "it" with his own best friend.. NEVER forget about it. (just a btw i still have the image stuck in my head and never forget how YOUNG he was..) (he ain't no virgin not more i guess lmfao.)

(MORE STORIES COMING SOON =D)

My friend told me I was so dark that I had no bright ideas...

i have fuck and sex with all the sexy naked ladies and they suck my balls (penis) but you aint have no girl friend your only friend yhey call him ching chong coz of your hairrline

Me and my friend (rope) like hanging out

Me with lonelylune

A friend will be there
with tissues
But a best friend will be
there with a baseball bat
shouting "Who hurt you
and do I need a shovel?"

Our Deaf Friend

Here is a story, my best friend was Chinese, his name was Chong- king. I took him to a restaurant one day and he said “ I am Chong king. I said I know your name is Chong king, within a few minutes he just randomly died making weird noises and turning blue by every second.

Anyone know what happened?

I gave my friend some paper. It cut his wrists

My friend tried high fiving me left him hanging

ME: Yo mama so fat her alphabet starts with O MY FRIEND: what’s that supposed to mean ME: O B C D

Me and my friend are walking we see a kid my friend asks him why he's crying and if he lost his parents he said yeah I slapped my friend because we were at an orphanage.

I see my friends at school they talk to me they go back to class but they forgot i am their class mate and they were like your dumbie and i was well your a dumba** bi***