Flat jokes
Q: Why are flat-earthers seen so many these days? A: Because one girl wore an earth-printed shirt.
I think my butt looks flat, but my boyfriend seems to think the opposite. I told him to be deadass with me.
I'd tell a Luigi joke, but it would fall flat faster than the line on his victim's heart monitor.
A girl called me ugly.
So I drove over her with a car and called her flat.
How do flat-earthers travel?
On a plane.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
Roses are red, violets are blue, You're so flat we can play chess on your chest!
I said I was going to my flat. I really meant your girl.
My mom was cooking dinner and asked me if I could get her a cutting board.
"No, I need you to take off your shirt and lay on the island so I can cut some chicken."
One time, I was working this steamroller when the guy who I squashed farted.
I guess that’s what you call “FLAT”ulence.
What’s the difference between a mountain and your girl?
At least the mountain has two hills.
The COVID-19 situation has been especially stressful for the Flat Earth Society.
They fear that social distancing measures could push people over the edge.
Flat.
what's flat and great for cutting? me.
Where would the next Formula race happen?
Answer: On your flat chest.
Girls are like rocks, the flat ones get skipped.
Yo mama so fat, flat earthers say she's round.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can’t see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Use the roast I put of flat earth.
Ur mum is so fat that when she lived in a flat on the highest floor, she fell through the inner floor.