Flat jokes
Flat girls be like, "I will have breasts in the future." This is to all the flat girls: you will never get it.
You don't have to worry about running while boys are around. Even I can't see anything there.
What do you call a flat emo?
A chopping block馃枻
The earth used to be flat.
Till they buried yo mama.
If I had a spray can, I would spray it on your ass. Because the instructions say to spray on flat surfaces.
what do you call a flat road named after George Floyd?
Flat neck road.
Your mum is so fat, flat earthers think she's round!
You know, the earth was flat till they buried your mama.
Don't pick flat chests because they will turn their backs on you twice.
Whenever a woman files a rape accusation, it鈥檚 obviously fake. Even the cows at my farm are more likely, at least they aren鈥檛 flat.
Teacher: Okay class, look at the person to the right of you and describe them with one word.
Me: *looks to the right of me and sees the pick-me girl* "Penny."
Teacher: *shocked* How is she a penny?
Me: 'Cause she's two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants. Not to mention worth practically nothing.
Why were there so many victims in the Grenfell flat fire disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
Your mum is so fat when she died the Earth was flat! 馃槀馃槀馃槀馃槀
Average bee is 50x smarter than the smartest flat earther.
The only thing flat earthers have to fear...
... is a sphere itself.
I'm such a good babysitter because the last person I babysat was so flat.
What's flat chested and emo? A cutting board.
Your chest is flatter than pre-Aristotle's concept of Earth.
Three guys are standing in an alley on an alien planet, and the psycho one says, "However many tits your girl has is how many balls you have!"
The first guy says, "Ha! My girlfriend has six! I'm racked up!" The second guy said, "Eh, I am happy with two balls." The third guy said, "Shit! My girlfriend is flat as fuck!"
A guy listening in enters and says, "Bro, you actually have girlfriends. I do not. Does that mean I have a pussy?"
She needs a flat surface cleaner.