A Canadian, an American and a Mexican were tasked by a billionaire with teaching his stubborn pet parrot how to speak within 2 weeks.
They were given everything they needed to succeed and a large sum of money was offered to the one who made the parrot talk first.
The Canadian played documentaries for the parrot through the whole duration, he spent all his time citing the alphabet and reading stories for the parrot.
The American showered him with the finest food, brought him all the females that he can mate with and made sure to spoil the parrot as much as he can.
The Mexican locked the parrot in a dark room, barely gave him any food or water and beat the shit out of him every single day.
When the time was up, the billionaire returned to find the parrot still unable to speak, so he asked the 3 trainers about their progress.
The Canadian goes: "I have tried everything, I spent all my time and energy teaching him the alphabet and reading books to him! Nothing worked."
The American agrees: "I have spoiled him beyond belief, gave him all the luxury he can possibly get and yet he won't speak!".
The Mexican confirms: "I have showered him with love and luxury as well, tried to teach him words day and night, spent all my time and energy spoiling him with everything I had!"
The parrot looks at the Mexican with disbelief and yells out: "You lying motherfucker!".
Asian Grading scale A- Average B- Half Average C- Stupid idiot D- FAILURE! CANT EVEN DO CALCULUS! F- FORGOTTEN FAILURE! CANT EVEN GET A JOB AT A MCDONALDS!
My bro’s parents died but he didn’t know why.
Turns out they died because he was a failure and he would be going to an orphanage in 4 days
A asian gets a choice between his rice cooker or his son he instantly picks the cooker and says "HE GOT A B+ IN MATHS LAST WEEK HES A FAILURE"
If at first you don't succeed, CHEAT.
If at first you don't succeed, oh well, so much for skydiving.
I had to write an essay about africa and I failed cause I plagiarized the hunger games script
I wrote an essay today about africa and I FAILED even though i wrote a perfect rendition of the hunger games storyline
How do you know if an Asian is a failure? Figure it out, because they'll all tell you their parents said they were a failure from birth.
4 kids at my school tried suicide and failed they are now known as the suicide squad
I'm such a perfectionist that I can't even fail an autism test
A guy tried to suffocate himself with his bmw exhaust but his engine failed. This is the first time German engineering fails to gas someone.
I tried to organize a professional Hide-and-Seek tournament, but it was a complete failure. Good players are hard to find.
A depressed kid didn't succeed at suicide and said " I'm a failure at suicide too.".
I don't like making Kobe jokes... they always crash and burn.
I don’t usually tell 911 jokes the usually crash and burn
Your hairline so bad that it turned wonder woman in to failure man
