Etymology jokes

Ever wonder where people got their surnames? Mr. Baker was probably a baker. Mr. Butcher was probably a butcher. And then there was Mr. Dickinson...

What is the longest word in the English Dictionary? "Smiles," because there is a mile between the first letter and the last.

What's the difference between saying "bloody" in America and in the U.K.?

In the U.K., it's a swear word.

In America, it's a family reunion.

"Disease" technically means "lack of ease," so if a girl is hard to get, call her a disease.

That's what Elliot Rodger did.

When a donkey digs a tunnel, it is called a burro.

Why isn’t the word “orphan” spelled with an “f” instead of “ph?” Because that “f” stands for “family,” and the word “orphan” doesn’t have a family.

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?

Because the “P” is silent.

Therapist just mean the-rapist.

What's the best time to hang out with an Indian? When your nose is clogged.

The name Brynley means "burnt wood" lolololol.

Vegan is actually an old Indian word for "bad hunter."

Fun fact: Toasters were originally called tanning breads!

Why did Oliver have no friends?

His last name was Clothesoff, and all the other kids would get in trouble whenever they would ask to play with Oliver Clothesoff.

What word starts with n and ends with r and you wouldn’t wanna call a Black person?

You really thought n****r, didn't you?

Is someone who is tardy again actually "retardy"?

POV: Her name is Alli.

Why don’t coffins have Wi-Fi?

Because they don’t want people to be so ‘connected’ while they’re trying to rest in peace.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent.

Most people don't realize this, but the F in orphan stands for family.

How names were named.

"I have to go because my tailor is at the gym where he will chase coal before dawn."

"SAY THAT AGAIN. SO MANY GOOD NAMES!"