Eric jokes

Nazis have marched in Melbourne. Are you sure Eric Clapton and Carrie Underwood are not touring in Australia?

Eric's mom asked her son why his bag was heavy and if it was because of books. Eric replied, "No, magazines."

We sped up the cycle of life and death, we gave Eric and Dylan a shortcut.

Hi Eric Le!

I used to have a son, but he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died. For inspiration.

My science teacher was talking about natural selection.

At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.

If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."

What did the DJ name his son?

Eric.

Yo mama so fat, she was mistaken for Eric Cartman from South Park.

Friend: Eric, spell mouse.

Eric: M O U S.

Friend: Yes - But what's on the end of it?

Mother: Who do you like more, me or your dad?

Liam: I like you both.

Mother: Ok, if I go to america and your dad goes to paris, where will you go?

Liam: I will go to paris.

Mother: That's means you like dad more.

Liam: No, its because i like paris.

Mother: Ok, fine, if I go to paris and your dad goes to america, where will you go?

Liam: I will go to America.

Mother: Why?

Liam: Because I have already gone to paris.

A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house. He got the outside.

A programmer and his wife.

She says, "We're out of bread. Please go to the grocery store and buy one. And if they've got eggs, get six."

After a while, he's back with six loaves of bread.

The wife asks, "Why did you buy 6 loaves of bread?"

He replies, "They had eggs."

Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. "1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10."