"You have to be more patient!" "Will it take a long time?"
I asked my friend how long i can be in sky he sayed if u are emo then forever
life is like a mcdonalds meal it only lasts 7 seconds for fat people
What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow? You can't milk a cow for over 10 years.
What do your girlfriend and a pool have in common? They both cost a lot of money for the amount of time you’re inside them.
What’s the difference between a job and a wife
The job keeps sucking after 5 years
A kid asks his father, " How long is our trip dad?" The kids father says , " Our trip is a fortnite."
A Canadian, an American and a Mexican were tasked by a billionaire with teaching his stubborn pet parrot how to speak within 2 weeks.
They were given everything they needed to succeed and a large sum of money was offered to the one who made the parrot talk first.
The Canadian played documentaries for the parrot through the whole duration, he spent all his time citing the alphabet and reading stories for the parrot.
The American showered him with the finest food, brought him all the females that he can mate with and made sure to spoil the parrot as much as he can.
The Mexican locked the parrot in a dark room, barely gave him any food or water and beat the shit out of him every single day.
When the time was up, the billionaire returned to find the parrot still unable to speak, so he asked the 3 trainers about their progress.
The Canadian goes: "I have tried everything, I spent all my time and energy teaching him the alphabet and reading books to him! Nothing worked."
The American agrees: "I have spoiled him beyond belief, gave him all the luxury he can possibly get and yet he won't speak!".
The Mexican confirms: "I have showered him with love and luxury as well, tried to teach him words day and night, spent all my time and energy spoiling him with everything I had!"
The parrot looks at the Mexican with disbelief and yells out: "You lying motherfucker!".
