Call jokes
Mom: Go clean your room, Little Johnny.
Little Johnny: No, it’s my room.
Mom: Well, it’s my house.
Little Johnny: Then go clean it.
Mom: Go to school!
At school:
Teacher: Hi, Little Johnny. You’re late.
Little Johnny: Watch because my son of a bitch mom told me to clean her room. I told her no, it’s my room, and then she said, 'Well, it’s my house.' Then I said, 'Go clean it,' and then she told me to go to school.
Teacher: Johnny, go to the principal’s office! You just came into school and now you're causing trouble. Go!
What do you call a black man in the army in camo? Incogneggo.
I was lying on the living room carpet the other day with my girlfriend on top of me in wings and a tutu, making out.
I called her the Fallen Angel.
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A saltshaker.
My girlfriend called me pedophile today.
Big word for a 12-year-old.
What do you call a Greek necrophiliac?
Con Fuckacarcass.
Q. What do you call a biracial kid in a vegetative state?
A. A mixed vegetable.
Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?
A. A loaded potato.
What do you call a man in a wheelchair with no legs?
Geo dude.
This is how animals were named.
"Bye Son." *cuts call*. What are we talking about?
"Bison. Perfect."
What do you call a wizard who can't secure a girl? Fumbledore.
What do you call an emo kid with light up shoes?
A human chandelier.
What do you call a fat transgender midget?
Jigglypuff.
What do you call a fat midget?
Jigglypuff.
What do you call a black woman?
A Nigg-girl.
What do you call the Illuminati when they take over the world and control everything?
The Jew World Order.
What do you call a peso?
A wetback greenback.
What do you call an orphan with a gun?
(No) home shooter.
Q. What do you call a CEO that's been shot in the head?
A. An ambulance.
What do you call a 90-year-old black man?
Antique farming equipment.